A proposal of deceit
by sekangel88
Summary: Roy finds his self with a proposal to protect his subordinates, one which he can't refuse. In the midst of it, Ed finds his self falling for the broken man and tries to help him overcome the darkness. Warning: Yaoi, Violence, Rape, MPREG.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal alchemist.

Warning: There is extreme violence and rape. Mentions of past one-sided Roy/Maes and eventual Roy/Ed.

* * *

><p>ONE<p>

Roy pinched the bridge of his nose as he felt an upcoming headache. Edward Elric, that menace, he thought annoyingly. The brat was getting destructive and it was costing the military its budget. Already they had to do some salary cuts in their department and he could already tell his coworkers were starting to hate it. Ed needed to control his self, he was almost seventeen for God's sake and he was just as wreckless as ever.

He let out a long heated sigh and took out a picture he always kept in his breast pocket. Staring back at him in the photo was Maes Hughes. The man unlike the smiling doting daddy in the photograph was six feet under ground and it was only himself that he could blame. Maes was it really this long ago that I last spoke with you? Roy thought savagely the last time he could have spoken with him and how it was wasted on him warning the man that he wasn't going to listen to him gush about his daughter. Ever since then, he knew it had to have been his fault. If he had kept close attention-

-No he shouldn't have involved him at all. Ed was quite stricken when he had found out and had a share amount of blame his self but when it came down to it, Roy was the one to sign the man's death certificate and not Ed. It was Roy's naïve dream of becoming Fuhrer that had been Maes undoing.

You really screwed up this time, the rest don't understand you like he had and yet he never even knew you loved him, his mind told him. You gave your whole heart to him knowing it was going to be broken because he had somebody already and already only viewed your love as brotherly. What would he have thought if he had only known that you loved him as he had Gracia.

Shaking his head to rid his thoughts of that, Roy slammed his head down to his desk whimpering. He couldn't show weakness, he couldn't. He still had Maes's murderer running free and he wasn't going to rest until the culprit was found. He fished his pocket watch from his trouser pocket and saw that it was almost midnight. He normally didn't like working and left as soon as he could to date with whatever woman it was that would get his mind off of his love. He shook his head again.

He would rest his head for only five minutes. After five minutes, he would go home and try to sleep. He would not think about Hughes or his family and he would meet with the general about the department's recent budget cuts and hope that they could get some leeway.

Closing his eyes, he told his self he was only resting his eyes. However, he was dead to the world by the time the minute came about.

* * *

><p>"Sir, I thought you would have honestly went home. Look at you, you're a mess."<p>

Roy shook his self awake and stifled a yawn. He nodded, barely listening to what Hawkeye really had to say before grabbing the necessary paperwork from his desk. He really needed to make sure that he had everything. He was about to shout to Havoc to make sure the rest remained in order before he flinched. Havoc wasn't likely to be back soon and in fact it was most likely not at all. It was his fault as well. If only Havoc hadn't gone with him, would he still be paralyzed from the waist down? Roy rubbed in forehead before quickly ordering Hawkeye to keep order. Everything was just one gigantic mess after another and he couldn't really blame others for their tempers. He had caused them this pain. He allowed them to be taken in without thinking about their safety.

"Sir, your gloves-" Roy only waved her off.

"Hawkeye, it should be fine. What could go wrong in a meeting about the budget. Keep them safe for me." Hawkeye looked dubious but let it go.

He quickly rushed up the flight of stairs to the room where he was supposed to meet the aging man. Truth be told, the man was only forty four, but he had stark gray hair as it was and quite a reputation of sleeping around. Roy suppressed another yawn as he knocked on the door before he was giving the go ahead to come in.

"General," Roy greeted snapping to attention and saluting the senior officer.

He thought it was odd that it was only him in the room. Usually the whole budget committee was in there as well. As he was motioned to take a seat, he did although a little nervous as to what it would be about. The general smiled when the other man had indeed sat. Roy didn't like the look on his face at all.

"I'm surprised you ask for leniency when you know the destruction that your youngest subordinate causes."

"I agree that Fullmetal is quite the menace sir but-"

"Stop interrupting Mustang. Thank you. Now I was told to cut the entire budget for the next three months but seeing as how you're department needs the budget, I don't think you quite know the predicament that we are in. We should write you up for allowing the brat to get away with so much."

Roy hung his head.

Of course he was going to be the one to be made an example of. Thing was, he did give the Elrics too much freedom not because they were just kids but because he felt he had to protect them. Edward was really oriented in obtaining his goals no matter what. He couldn't fault Ed for wanting to succeed. Even if it meant he would get into lots of trouble, he was willing to make sure all his subordinates were safe. Because just like he had once said back in Ishbal, he could only protect a small number of people so that they could go on and do the same. This was why he had wanted to become Fuhrer.

King Bradley must have sensed it.

He made this General Mitchell in charge of their department. Ever since then, it was one mess after another for Roy to deal with. The general even seemed to hold some type of selfish interest in Roy his self, he didn't know what but it was scary.

"I guess I'll have to punish you to the fullest unless-"

"You're saying you'll keep your mouth shut for a price?" interrupted Roy bewildered at the suggestion.

The general nodded.

"Of course you're never going to agree to this-"

"Anything, my subordinates don't need anything bad marked down in their record," Roy quickly defended.

The general smirked.

" Well, if you're sure...Fine, the Elrics will have their own funds to cover them yearly. Tell them to use it wisely. Your department will be safe. Hell, for a bonus I'll even throw in that experimental treatment for Havoc so that you could have your employer back. Of course none of that is free just as you have guessed." The general narrowed his eyes as if to warn him to choose wisely.

Roy knew it was too much to ask but he did want all of those things to happen. Before he knew it, he was trapped in the corner of the wall with the general over him, one leg positioned between his feet and with a nasty smile. Roy didn't even have his gloves to fend off the attack. He was dumb for thinking he wouldn't need them. But just as slowly, the general whispered in his ears, his breath tickling Roy's lobes.

"Okay here are the rules since you want to see all that happen. Rule one, you will do what I want when I want it and without complaint. Rule two, you tell nobody of what I get from you. This is an agreement between you and me, not my wife nor the fucking Fuhrer. Besides he would be disgusted with it and it's not like my wife is any good anyways. Rule three, when I call, you drop everything and come. As soon as you disobey any of these, I will bury your subordinates with enough to land them in prison. Oh and the last thing is that I can change and make new rules as I see fit. You don't like it, back out now. Go on, I knew from the bizarre look in your face that you wanted to attack me right here and now."

Roy closed his eyes to the taunts and instead concentrated on his harsh breathing. Oh hell he would do anything for his subordinates and he seemed to know it too. It took a second for him to nod before he was turned around and slammed up against the wall. His pants was yanked down before he could protest. The general paused to lock the doors and pull the blinds before grabbing Roy's hair and slamming his face against the corner.

"Stay there and don't move. Try to relax. I heard as long as you relax, you could find it pleasant as well."

Roy didn't think so. He felt his boxers get pulled down and pooled around his ankles but didn't do anything about it, only flinching as he remembered the one rule was to do what he wanted without complaint. He just about screamed however when he felt a huge penetration behind him. He wanted to claw his eyes out to get away from the pain but singlehandedly with one hand, the general grabbed both of Roy's hands and pinned it over his head. He wrapped his other around Roy's hips, burying himself until he was up to the hilt in Roy and then pulling out, only to thrust back into him just as quickly using his arms around his hip to keep up the hash pace.

Roy suppressed his screams even though that was all he wanted to do. Instead, he tried to subside the growing amount of forbidden liquid from falling from the corner of his eyes. The general above him kept grunting and moaning to the thrusts, obviously enjoying this at Roy's expense. With two more thrusts, he collapsed onto Roy, burying his backside with his release. The general pulled out, again pulling Roy's hair, to face him. Smirking he pulled him into a searing kiss before throwing him down onto the floor before lifting up his legs.

In his blind panic to avoid the pain a second time, Roy at first tried to stop him only to be pinned against the wall. He attempted to struggle until he heard a chuckle.

"So Mustang, you are willing to throw away all that protection because of a little bit of pain. How nice and endearing. I for one never thought you would have been this heartless."

Roy flinched at the voice but forced his self to stiffen, allowing the general to do as he pleased. The response to that was being backhanded in the face. He temporarily saw stars before he was then lifted and bended over the table before he felt the same searing pain as before. He cried out only to have the general's hand curl over it, successfully cutting off his anguished yelps of agony. The general thrust hard into Mustang and then pulled back out before thrusting in again ignoring the muffled cries and the blood seeping slowly down Roy's leg.

"Come on Mustang, it should feel good for you. Didn't think you were one to cry out just because it was painful." He continued to thrust into him harshly, before he released his seed for the second time.

The release was even painful for Mustang because his insides were torn up. He let Roy fall to the floor before getting in front of him with a smirk. Roy obediently stayed where he was avoiding the feeling of fright that passed through his body. The general only smiled again before backhanding Roy once again.

"Clean up and get back to work. Be discreet and I'll be coming over to your house around nine so don't go anywhere, okay."

Roy nodded in understanding so the other man threw his towel down and pulled Roy into another deepening kiss, which left Roy breathless for air. The general ruffled up Roy's hair in an affectionate manner before continuing.

"I guess you haven't been with another guy before. We'll have to work on it Mustang. Oh and before I forget, I don't like to share. You better be willing to bet whoever comes into your life is going to lose when they're going up against me."

The only blessing Roy had when he finally was able to limp his way back to the office was that nobody else but him would be hurt.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal alchemist.

Warning: There is extreme violence and rape. Mentions of past one-sided Roy/Maes and eventual Roy/Ed.

* * *

><p>TWO<p>

If Roy thought it was bad in the office, the man was ruthless in the surroundings of his own home. Since both of them weren't working, the general didn't feel the need to muffle Roy's screams of pain. The bastard was already seated within him when Roy squeezed his eyes shut and bit his lip as his body tried to compensate the large intrusion.

"Hey gorgeous, I want to hear you scream for me," the general told him before leaning down and placing a kiss on his forehead.

Who knew even with the rough hours of sex the man liked to have that he could be so gentle? Roy winced before pulling his eyes open to search his face for any hint other than lust. He found none which made him sick at the pit of his stomach but he didn't move to do anything and the general seemed to be waiting for something.

"Come on darling, you gonna agree to scream for me?"

Roy was about to open his mouth to give the man an answer before he clamped it shut. Here the guy was buried deep inside Roy and he was waiting for his answer. Unbelievable. He was brought out of his thoughts by a pinch in his arm. He yelped giving the general an opening to which he stuck his tongue in. Roy let him but felt bile in his throat at the fact that the guy was exploring every inch of his mouth. When he began to pull out Roy winced since it was still healing from the tearing earlier in the day.

"Come on colonel. I want to hear you scream." He furiously pumped in and out while all the while glaring at the man beneath him.

"Gen-general!"

"Name's Charles baby. Use it," the general ordered.

Roy did and oh boy did the general love that mouth. Unbeknownst to Roy, when the general had first transferred over, he had only heard rumors of the colonel and his infamous reputation. He didn't know that the colonel was beautiful as well. His own failing marriage held a testament to how well he was with dealing with relationships. His wife Kate was thinking about leaving him and taking their twin daughters with her. Just let her he thought, starting to up the pace again making a scream tear from Roy's throat.

He glared.

Roy was so handsome, so dead drop sexy and he bet that the man had never had any relationship problems. He probably would get any girl he wanted without any thought. Of course he heard that the man didn't stay with just one girl. It also angered him that he took advantage of that. He pulled his cock out only to flip Roy over suddenly not wanting to see his pretty face at the moment. He pushed his self back into the entrance and for the time being, he didn't care if the other was screaming into his pillow. He was so angry with the younger man that he was ruthlessly thrusting into him without a second thought. Panting he lowered his head to nibble on Roy's earlobes. Another thing he loved about the man. Was there anything flawless on the man's body?

Well, Charles did observe the scars that marked the younger male. But even the scars held a beauty that he couldn't truly understand. Now pounding into him, he thrust into him a couple more times before losing his seed into the other. He pulled out and laid back watching for movement. When Roy failed to even lift a finger, Charles inspected it further to see that the man had passed out.

No matter, he thought. His wife was gonna bitch at him if he was any later than he planned to be and he wasn't finished with Mustang. He grabbed his face and popped him one. He saw that nothing was working and decided to let him wake on his own. He was going to be late so he decided that Mustang was going to pay. Dropping him he waited.

He observed a big red blot on the sheets and surmised that he was a little hard on the man. No worries he thought. It was Mustang his self that agreed to this proposal he could have refused. But he was lucky to learn of his weakness and from the Fuhrer no less. It started when he tried unsuccessfully to stay on the topic about the Colonel in question.

"Do you have an interest in the colonel perhaps? Yes, he is a great leader, rose in the ranks mighty fast and still only thirty years old. He's everything I hope for in a soldier of course, except the fact that he lets his feelings for his subordinates weigh him down." King Bradley had told him upon his sudden interest.

Charles had listened with interest as the Fuhrer continued to talk. Most of it he already knew. The colonel brought a twelve year old into the army and instead of being condoned for it, they held him in higher regards. It was a child no less, even. But there were still only good things that could be told about Mustang. He never left anybody behind if he could help it and would rather be in harm's way then risk one of his men. That was true dedication. It was when he met him a day later that the general realized he needed the man with all his being.

A groan brought him out of his thoughts and he smirked.

"You up?"

He hated being ignored but he could see that Mustang wasn't aware of his surroundings just yet. He towered above him and started nibbling on his throat, working his way down hoping it was arousing the younger man. He grinned when he saw his work and pulled him in a seated position.

"Mustang, come on," he goaded.

The man groaned again before seeming more alert. Charles laid back bringing mustang over him. He laughed at the man's face before situating his cock just below the entrance. He paused before pushing him back down and trying to find a lubricant so that he didn't have to worry about bleeding anymore. He was horny still damn it and he wanted to fuck Mustang over and over again. Finding lotion on the table, he saw that it most likely was one of the dates that probably brought it over and forgot about it.

He poured some and spread a numerous amount over his self before laying back down and resituating Mustang. The man didn't fight but he didn't seem to like it either. He pulled him down on his member watching the other groan in pain until once again he was fully inside.

"Ride me," he commanded and then he laid back waiting for him to carry his order out.

Wincing, Roy did as he was told. He was going at a painstakingly slow pace that Charles was quickly fed up with it and once again had Mustang on his back. This time he lifted his legs over his shoulders before he pounded in him. He came for the third time that night and collapsed on Mustang's belly. He smiled before he pulled out and went to get dressed.

When he got back, Mustang was under the covers and sound asleep. He smiled and put a peck on his cheek. He really wanted to stay and savor the taste that he admitted he was already greedy with, he realized he couldn't. Clara and Maria needed him. So with one last ruffle of the hair, he left through the front door missing the flinch that had been on his beloved's face.

"Sir, do your work."

Roy nodded.

Another day at work and Fullmetal had yet to show up. Hawkeye was demanding as ever but he couldn't blame her for that. The work was important but he just couldn't concentrate. His whole body ached and whenever he tried to change into a comfortable position, sharp pain shot from his lower pelvis region. He barely kept his self from wincing but couldn't keep grimace from his face whenever he felt the stab of pain.

"Sir are you okay? It seems that you are in pain."

Roy silently cursed.

"No Hawkeye, I slept in a very uncomfortable position last night." Roy silently pleaded that she would accept his answer. He needed her to accept it.

Breda just laughed.

"Looks like the colonel just had a late night with a girl that means." Hawkeye rolled her eyes but a knowing grin graced her lips and Roy was relieved that she bought it so quickly.

Going back to his paperwork, he attempted to concentrate this time. No more of a reason to get called down by the overenthusiastic general. No he wasn't going to get caught slacking anymore. Hawkeye seemed to be mighty trusting today for she didn't supervise him at all which was odd. Breda was doing his own reports and the rest of the team were doing various missions handed to them the week before.

He let a small grin grace his lips.

It hurt what he let the man do to him but as long as nobody else would have to suffer in the process, then he was glad. He happened to be glancing at the next sheet, trying to read it when one of the sergeant majors entered hesitantly. Was everyone of high rank and power abusing it, Roy asked his self mentally. The sergeant major was shaking but he made a salute and clicked his heels together.

"Sir, the general wants to talk to you."

Roy just stared at him in utter disbelief before what that meant to him finally reached his brain. Closing his mouth, he stood up and returned the salute, dismissing the soldier before he wet his pants. He turned to Hawkeye, silently waiting for her to tell him that he couldn't make it then and to call up the man to tell him he couldn't but she never did. He was reluctant to see the man again after last night but realizing that it was utterly hopeless and that he had the future of others to think about, he made to go.

He reached the doorknob before his lieutenant said something.

"Sir don't look so down. I doubt it was any less horrible than your talk about the budget and you're always thinking the worse."

Once outside in the hallway, Roy let out a trembling breath, almost collapsing from shear horror. It was one thing to protect everyone below him and make sure that they were taken care of but it was another to sacrifice everything to make sure that happened. He paused and breathed in deeply, aiming to get his breathing back to normal before he reached there.

You could do it Mustang, it isn't like you didn't deserve it, Roy told his self. You killed countless Ishbalans, got your best friend killed, and caused Havoc his injury.

He hesitated at the door and breathed deeply. It's not like I'm being asked to kill. I only need to give my body in exchange for this, he continued to think. He pulled open the door handle and found his self inside. Catching sight of the irate general, he attempted to salute him in greeting only for the man to motion for him to stop.

He blinked in surprise before doing as he was told. The general smiled from his desk, no doubt thick with the desire to jump the colonel's bones. Roy gulped and took a step towards him only for the general to stand up.

"Lock the door before coming over here. Don't worry I have a legitimate reason for you to be here."

Roy nodded and clicked the lock into place before working his way over. After he was in close approximation with the man, he honestly thought it would be about the sex again.

"General what-"

He was struck hard on the cheek. Holding where he was smacked, he wondered what it was he had done wrong. All he did was begin to ask what was going on when he was hit. He didn't understand the man at all. He flinched back when the man lifted his hands again only to realize that he cupped his face.

"It is true what they say about the infamous baby face as well. I love it." He glared and Roy attempted to swallow his own spit to keep from appearing frightened of the other. "Call me Charles when we're alone, I already told you that."

Roy quickly nodded.

Charles backhanded him.

"Say it. I want to hear you say it!"

"Yes, I promise to call you Charles-"

"When," Charles inquired angrily.

"-when we're alone," Roy finished with a panicked gulp.

Charles smirked and released his hold on Roy's face before going back to the desk and grabbing a folder.

"Remember when I told you that I would help your Lieutenant with the treatment his spinal cord suffered?"

Roy began to nod but froze.

"Yes Charles."

"Very good. You're learning. I'm glad you care very much about your subordinates. Don't worry though, I know what you're capable of as well and how you could be planning to sabotage me. Well, I have a colleague that doesn't mind dirtying their hands for me. He has records upon records that I'll have him release if anything happens to me and it's substantiated murder."

He sneered before showing the contents of the package that held the forms possible for his subordinate to receive the treatment. The only thing absent was the general's signature on it. At first Roy was curious as to why he hadn't signed it only to realize why. His astonishment grew even as tremors started to wrack his body. Charles seemed to know that Roy concluded what he had to do but didn't do a thing otherwise.

"It's missing a signature Charles," Roy pointed out with a gulp.

His throat was parched. Licking his cracked lips, he watched as Charles's expression grew amused at the fact that Roy wasted no time in asking what he had to do without downright saying it.

"So it is babes, so it is."

Roy felt a sudden alarm when Charles arms wrapped around him in a hug. He flinched at the sudden warmth and how even though he should have felt it, his body remained absent of the feeling. It took another second for him to continue but after the frightened pause he continued.

"What do I have to do?"

Charles grin widened before pushing Roy down to his knees. Roy hadn't been expecting that but then he hadn't honestly knew what it was he was supposed to. Charles stood above him with a cunning grin before cupping his chin and rubbing it in a loving manner. He cringed. It felt so wrong and he felt so dirty but again reminded his self why he was doing this. He just had to picture Hughes and his gentle touches in his imagination although it was rather hard to do with the rough way Charles handled him.

"Give me a blow job. On your knees."

Roy obeyed. He was uncertain how to go about it but when Charles smacked his hand away from the zipper, Roy concealed a look of terror when the man got irritated and gripped Roy's head, bringing his mouth level with the zipper.

"Use your teeth you little fucker," Charles demanded. "Do a lame ass job and you could kiss this deal goodbye."

Roy winced.

It took him a couple of minutes to draw the zipper down with his teeth and once he succeeded he realized he didn't know what he would do next. He never had been with a guy before and he never had these type of fantasies before about Hughes. It was mostly tender loving ones where he made love to Roy, not lusted after him.

"I'm sorry why are you stopping?" Charles asked snidely.

"Ugh, Charles I've never done this before, what am I-"

Maybe because he was impatient, Charles opened his boxers allowing his hardened cock out of his pants. He glared at Roy and looked pointedly down before Roy got the hint and engulfed the member with his warm mouth. Charles let out a strangled moan before thrusting his hips forward, nearly choking Roy who wasn't used to this sort of treatment. Roy was taking too long to learn how to do this so the other man yanked him by the hair and started thrusting in and out of the younger male's mouth. He ignored the fact that the man was gagging with his imminent need to feel good.

He finally came in Roy's mouth, smiling when the man had swallowed every drop whether he meant to or not. He pulled him into a kiss, tasting his self in Roy's mouth moaning at how hot that made him. He shoved Roy over his desk much to the man's immense displeasure and yanked his pants and boxers down in one go. Before he could ask why, Charles penetrated the man and picked up his quick speed. Roy wasn't bleeding anymore from the intrusion but it still hurt. He would have screamed had Charles not had the forthright to stuff cotton in his mouth.

"Oh…Baby," Charles moaned.

When he cummed inside him, he finally pulled out and allowed Mustang to clean his self up. He smirked at the state he was in before making a big show of signing the form. This was going to help him prove that as long as Mustang did what he was told, everything would go smoothly.

Roy was dressed and struggling to not run at the first opportunity. The cloth was long gone from his mouth. Charles must have sensed something like that because he put a peck onto his chapped lips before smiling.

"Well there's going to be rehab after this drug but your lieutenant is going to be fine. Baby, go back and do your work and I'll come by tonight and reward you."

Roy was desperate in making sure that he wouldn't but just as he opened his mouth to protest, Charles already beat him to it. 

"Hmm, I see you're already getting bored. Think that Elric kid knows how to do a proper blow job?"

Just like that, Roy sealed his mouth shut.

That man had him trapped and there was no way out.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal alchemist.

Warning: There is extreme violence and rape. Mentions of past one-sided Roy/Maes and eventual Roy/Ed.

* * *

><p>THREE<p>

Roy exhaustedly looked over the files for the fire inspections. The ones after that were sightings of Scar, the one man that was so far proving elusive. The only good thing about today was the officers meeting for generals and above. Then Charles had mentioned something about spending times with his two girls.

Roy didn't know what disturbed him more. The fact that Charles used the Elric brothers to get sexual favors out of him or the fact that the man was fucking him when he had a wife and kids.

He miserably laid his forehead on the desk, only planning to rest his eyes for a minute or two. He never expected his self to fall asleep but woke with a start at the sound of the door slamming open. Before he could attempt to piece together what happened, he found his self pulled forward by his shirt and cringed back before seeing the angry face of Edward Elric.

The teenager frowned.

"Was I really seeing that? Are you trying to play dumb with me Colonel Bastard? I got a call saying our budget was cut over two weeks ago-"

"Edward it was fixed okay. You need to start reporting in or you're never going to know what's going on."

Ed seemed frozen despite the fact he was originally angry. He couldn't place it but the Colonel wasn't the same as when he left. That was absurd though! He only left a month and Mustang was always fine before. That's how he knew something was up though. The man in question looked exhausted and he lost weight. He didn't really weigh that much to begin with so those few precious pounds he had desperately needed. He frowned when he realized the one big indicator of all.

He raised his hand to test it out by swinging it close to the colonel's face but stopped just before striking him. It didn't make a difference; Mustang instinctively recoiled against it.

"What have you been up to these days Mustang?"

"Nothing Edward. Do me a favor and move your hand from my face, it's not a pretty sight especially this morning."

Okay, Ed thought distractedly.

"You do know that it's noon right?" Ed decided to humor him.

Roy blinked before fishing for his pocket watch, only to confirm it.

"Ugh, so it is."

That's all he had to say. Ed found his anger rising. Why did he have to act like an asshole every time he showed anything remotely kind to the man. Despite his dislike for the manipulative bastard, he didn't hate him. He never ratted on them so that was a plus. Ed crossed his arms. He decided he didn't care about it anymore. If the colonel was going to act like it wasn't horribly bad, he would be going along with it.

"Boss that you?"

They turned and saw the last person they had expected-well Ed did really. Mustang just looked happy to see him. But Ed didn't really expect him to be around so soon. The man was using a cane as well. Did that mean that Mustang somehow found a way to help?

"Oy Mustang, did you have a hand?"

Mustang ignored this and instead turned around in his chair, failing to suppress a wince of pain. Ed's jaw dropped at the movement. Mustang wasn't taking care of his self. Sighing, he turned to Havoc, only to see him silently watching. He was about to demand to know what he was looking at, when Havoc jerked him by the coat and motioned for him to follow.

"I guess I'll give the report later bastard." Ed groused.

"That's colonel bastard to you." Figures. Mustang had automatically replied without missing a beat.

Once outside, he turned to Havoc for the explanation.

"I don't know what is going on either but I don't like it." Havoc told him.

Ed nodded.

Surely there had to be something. Roy never flinched like that. He may act like an uncaring ass the majority of the time but he did protect them from sleazy military men wanting to use them to fulfill their lust. Ed was happy that to say that he would never admit that he wholeheartedly respect that man as well. Glancing back at the door, Ed felt a little heartbroken that Mustang was acting this way. He noticed Hawkeye coming and sure enough she stopped in front of them.

"It's good that you're getting better Havoc. I'm glad that you can walk again."

"Thanks to Mustang. I don't know what he did but that new general Mitchell that was recently hired. He signed for it and told me to be sure to thank the man."

Hawkeye nodded.

"Lieutenant, do you think that he's acting rather differently?" Ed interrupted.

Hawkeye blinked.

"Oh Ed, I didn't see you there." Seeing as how he was seething from the height comment if he ever heard one, she quickly added. "Where's Alphonse?"

"He went back to the hotel."

"Well, honestly, it has been a little weird. I chalked it up to the meeting at the budget committee. He needs a vacation is what he needs."

Ed nodded already feeling better. He supposed it was a mental fallout of some kind brought on by being a jackass all the time. He could even get the general in on it. He decided to go back into the office.

"Hey Mustang, don't you think you should put in for leave?"

Roy looked up and groaned.

Insolent brat, he thought.

"NO Edward. I need to really finish these papers."

"Why don't you?"

"Because if they aren't done, a lot of people will get mad. It might also help to see you from over here without all the paperwork."

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SMALLER THAN A BEAN!"

"You," Roy said once again without missing a beat.

"Fine," Ed snapped. "I was worried for nothing. If you can make height jokes, there's nothing."

Roy nodded.

It was when he exited for the second time that he let his head drop in his hands. Oh Ed, you can't know. I don't know how long I can keep protecting you but for your sake I'm going to try. I'm going to keep you safe and everyone else I care about if I could. I'm not losing any more people. Hughes, he whined once he got to him. I wish you were here. You knew what to do. You always did. And now I'm almost at a dead end with no way out except the noose I tied myself on.

* * *

><p>All that had come up with bile. Mustang kept his face planted on the toilet bowl until he was sure he wouldn't need to throw up again. Intense razor-sharp pain resounded from his abdomen again and it left him biting his lip to keep from bawling. If that wasn't bad enough, he felt more bile rise from his throat and vomited once again.<p>

The bile was yellow to yellowish green. Roy would have been worried enough to go to a doctor if he hadn't been terrified that the doctor would also want to check other things as well. Doctors were nosy in general also so it was better to stay away from one.

After going fifteen minutes without vomiting, Roy made to actually get some sleep in when he remembered the state of his sheets. Yanking them off, he winced at seeing the big blood stain from one of Charles nights of passion. He threw it to the corner of the room with every intention of burning it when he had the chance. First he pulled on new sheets and made sure there wasn't any blood anywhere else. Satisfied, he laid down on his side, twitching at every sound that couldn't be explained. He finally fell into a fitful sleep.

It didn't last long and he found his self alerted awake with the need to retch and covered his mouth, running back to the bathroom. He heaved into the sink not even making it to the toilet this time around. His stomach still hurt some but sleep was able to dull it down to an annoyance as he vomited for the ninth time that night. It was nine o'clock at night and he knew if there was ever the chance of Charles escaping his family and coming over here, it would be now.

He hid under the covers, not being able to go back to sleep until he was so sure that he wasn't even coming. His body trembled at the prospect while his mind anticipated anything going on. He thought he imagined it when he heard a rap knock at the front door. He tried telling his self it was a figment of his imagination until it sounded a second time.

He pulled the covers off and raced to the front door, slowly opening it only to mentally sigh in relief. It wasn't the gray haired general but the blonde alchemist who was for some strange reason worried about him all day today.

Edward had his hands buried deep into his pockets and seemed to anxiously pop open his pocket watch every so often. It couldn't have been any more easier for Fullmetal than it was for him. Why was he here was the question though. Seeing as how Edward missed the fact that the door was already half way opened Roy decided to speak up as well.

"Edward?"

Edward jumped at his name.

"Oh Colonel, I was just passing through and thought that I should check up on you. Certainly not because anybody told me to. Hawkeye and everyone is very worried. They said you recently haven't been feeling well. I quite agree. You lost a few pounds when you should be gaining. You are already thin. Wouldn't want to ruin that epic baby face." Roy winced at the last part. Why was it that everybody loved his baby face? Ed continued not seeing the colonel's reaction to his words. "And then there's Breda who said let us pick straws to see who gets to visit the colonel. Major maybe you should go. You seem to really care for him even though he does act like a jack ass-"

"So you guys are really worried for me?"

Ed smiled genuinely up at him.

It wasn't the fake kind that Charles put on his face when he accidentally went too far during intercourse and caused him to bleed again. The man seemed to think if anything else that Roy deserved that. Any girl that looked at Roy with more than curiosity made the general punish him more. He remembered Charles saying that he didn't like to share him and can see what he meant finally. Turning back to Edward, he noticed that the boy did seem agitated from something.

"Well if you say you're fine, I wouldn't be needed now would I? I was just seeing if you were fine and nothing else. You know because even though you may be a bastard, I never forgot what you did for us. You could have ratted us out and saved your own skin but you didn't. You give us the space we need and do your best to shield us like from when Hughes died. I know that you can't protect me from everything but I know you do your absolute best." Ed admitted causing the colonel to become startled.

"I should really go, you know. Al knows I'm here and everything but-"

Roy quickly grasped his hand and Edward looked over in confusion. He avoided looking into those penetrating golden eyes, but that didn't stop him from feeling bad for doing this. He shouldn't need to feel frightened let alone be begging Elric to do something about it. Sighing, he tried to calm his too fast beating heart.

"I'm sorry…Can you stay a bit longer?"

Edward seemed to be weighing the options and when Roy finally risked a glance, he saw that Ed was thoughtful and didn't seem to be mad at the sudden request.

"I'll stay as long as you need me to."

Roy had never felt more grateful.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal alchemist.

Warning: There is extreme violence and rape. Mentions of past one-sided Roy/Maes and eventual Roy/Ed.

* * *

><p>FOUR<p>

Ed was honestly taken aback when Roy had asked him that. He seized the opportunity and followed him into the apartment, locking the door behind him as extra security more than anything else. Roy was in the back bedroom leaning his head against the headboard and Ed could finally see how tired the colonel honestly looked.

"Hey Colonel you should sleep-"

He was cut off by Roy shaking his head before pulling him forward. Ed blushed. This was the colonel's bedroom and his bed he was in! He knew that the colonel didn't know how he really felt about him but that's because Ed was quick to insult him to cover those feelings up. From the very first time he had met the man, Ed really was inspired. Mustang had been quick to tell him not to give up and gave him hope. Soon he found that Mustang had stolen his heart as well. Without meaning to he leant into the other man.

"Lay down and sleep Mustang, you need your sleep."

The older man shook his head again and Edward sighed in annoyance. Before he could continue, he was cut off by warm lips over his. He froze. His eyes widened but Edward found his self not complaining. He closed his eyes and put his arms around Mustang's neck, deepening it. He pushed his tongue across the colonel's teeth, seeking entrance and once granted it, tasted every cavern. He guided the man on his back, still in the midst of exploring his mouth but now from on top of the elder.

He pulled back for air and searched Mustang's expression for anything that would tell him what brought this on. Hands tugged him back on top and pulled him into another kiss. Ed didn't really mind but didn't the colonel know that he was going too far with this? He had no idea what the other thought about him but isn't it supposed to be special when two people did this? He quickly pulled his self away for the second time, arching his eyebrows.

"Mustang you better explain-"

"Ed please," he begged.

If Ed wasn't shocked by his behavior he was now.

"Why? Don't you want to wait to do it with something special? I admit that this is nice but-"

"Funny that you don't think you're special." The grin threw Ed back making him believe that the guy was being a bastard until he continued. "Please, I want to feel this."

Ed seemingly thought a bit of what it would do. If Mustang allowed him to do it wouldn't he later hate him? Mustang wasn't feeling well and this felt like he was taking advantage of the man in his weakened state. But here the man was begging him and he didn't seem to feel out of sorts. Sighing, he gave his self in defeat. He planted another kiss on Mustang's lips before placing small kisses on his cheek. He nibbled on the man's earlobes watching in amusement when the elder moaned. Lowering his self, he kissed lower and then helped him take his shirt off. He licked and nibbled both stumps before licking and biting his way down to his belly button. He looked up before he even considered touching the man's pajama pants.

"You sure about this? I mean, you can't change your mind-"

"Yes, I'm sure Edward."

Sighing, he cupped Mustang's chin forcing the man to open his eyes and look at him.

"I mean it Roy. If you aren't positive then I'm not going to do it. I don't do something I know someone isn't going to like. Please say something if you don't really like this. I won't be able to stop myself afterwards okay."

Mustang nodded.

Taking that as a yes, Ed finally shed Mustang of his pants and boxers. Taking off his own clothes, he planted another kiss on Mustang's lips, grinding his hips down until the man moaned in pleasure. He was still very anxious about this though. He experimented a couple of times in his past but for all he knew, Mustang had never even had sex with a man. Grinding his self on Mustang again, he felt the man buck his hips forward causing he himself to groan. He anticipated that Mustang was going to be horrible at this but he was proving the opposite.

"Last chance Roy. If you don't want this, you better speak up," Edward cautioned him.

Mustang moaned again. Pulling him into another kiss, he savored the taste wondering if this was how it was supposed to be. The way Charles went about it, he thought Edward was going to do the same exact thing but so far, the blonde haired alchemist had proven that he was anything but. He was gentle and in turn he started to get into it. So when Ed kept asking if he was sure, well Mustang was more sure than he had ever been about anything.

He felt Ed get up and thought he wasn't going to do anything. He felt a little disappointed but found his self happy that Ed went this far. He attempted to locate where the other went albeit the fact that it was super dark and he could hardly make anything out. He was about to sit up when the alchemist was back ravaging him more than ever before.

"You're really impatient. I was getting something to make this experience more pleasurable for both of us," Ed explained.

Ed started to fondle his member and Roy let out a tiny gasp. Ed beamed before positioning a finger at the entrance. He thrust it in making the other gasp in pain and try to retreat from it. Ed quickly held onto his hips but paused in what he was doing, keeping the finger still.

"It'll go away. It's going to hurt a little but you'll like it, I promise." He placed a kiss on his forehead. He waited a second before continuing.

His other hand wrapped around Roy's cock and started to jerk him off. Keeping his mind from what he was doing was a good idea, Ed surmised and frowned when it didn't stop the man from letting out a little cry when he inserted a second finger.

"Do you want me to continue?" Ed thought this was unbelievable that Mustang wanted him to hurt him like this. He inserted a third finger waiting for the man to tell him to stop but he never did.

He withdrew his fingers and sat Roy up.

"Are you sure you want this?" He didn't mean to sound like a broken record but the man didn't seem to enjoy this. Without hesitation Roy nodded again that yes, he wanted it so Ed looked away.

If he kept looking at the man, he wasn't going to be able to do this. Why the man wanted him to pleasure him was a mystery and he felt wrong just for doing it. He coated his member with lubricant wondering why it was him that Mustang wanted. He got on top of the man, positioning his self just before his entrance before pushing his self in.

It was much more than a grunt of soreness. Mustang didn't enjoy this. Ed deeply considered halting at this point but he was already buried fully inside him. Come to think of it, even this was weird. He waited for Mustang to adjust to him before pulling half way out and slamming back in. He almost pulled all the way out to call this quits by just the sounds of agony alone but Mustang pulled him fully inside him again. He looked over in annoyance before Mustang spoke up.

"Please. I need you to do this."

"Why, you're not enjoying it and it's hurting you." He waited for the man's reply and at first received none. He was going to give this up before he finally said.

"I want it from someone that wouldn't do it for only lust."

"Then why pick me, I'm sure there's a lot of grateful people that wouldn't waste a second in doing you and they probably love you even!"

"Please Ed."

"Why," Ed demanded feeling his heart break. "Why me?"

"Because I trust you."

Although Ed accepted the statement, it didn't stop him from biting the inside of his lip every time he heard the painful grunt nor did he feel right for allowing his self to hurt the man. He tried to best to be gentle without hurting him too much. He concealed his dislike for this but also found his self consumed in anger. He respected this man too much though and hearing another painful groan, he wanted to end this quickly. Closing his eyes, he picked up the pace, plunging even deeper, pulling out only to shove his way in again.

He was driven into getting it over with, he almost missed the moans become pleasurable.

"OH GOD! WHATEVER YOU JUST DID DO IT AGAIN!"

Ed didn't need to be told twice. He hid a smirk knowing that the thing Mustang was experiencing was the result of Ed finding the prostate. He hit it repeatedly hearing the once painful grunts turn into moans of pleasure. Lifting up Mustang's legs onto his shoulder, he aimed to hit that spot exactly each and every time.

"OH Ed…I'm gonna.."

"Cum for me then." Ed felt rammed into him a couple more times, released his orgasm and pulled out.

Still seeing that Mustang wasn't quite finished, he pulled the hardened cock in his mouth feeling the man jerk in surprise. He held the hips down and bobbed his head a couple times before swallowing everything with Mustang's release.

Smiling at the man, he pulled him into another kiss allowing him to taste his self in Ed's mouth.

"Did it really hurt that much?" Ed asked with a frown after he remembered the reason he wanted to stop in the first place.

He turned to get the answers only to hear snores from the man. He sighed. This guy was going to be the death of him but he found a small smile grace his lips. He loved Mustang a lot and if this was any indication, he felt it triple in size by Mustang's admission that out of everyone he could have picked this for, he contemplated only Edward out of trust. Did he not like Hawkeye enough for this? He seemed to have feelings for her. Havoc was grateful for him and he doubted Havoc would turn the request down either so why him?

Stretching out on the bed, he wanted answers. He considered waking him up to demand them but noticed that he really needed the sleep. Scooting over, he extended an arm around him before falling asleep his self.

* * *

><p><p>

He prayed to a God he didn't believe in that Charles wouldn't notice anything. It had been exactly two weeks and no calls to his office. Maybe, the man was getting along with his wife again. It was that long but Roy found his self constantly waiting up at night for Ed to come to his apartment, and when each time he did, he begged for the constant warmth he felt whenever Ed was inside of him. A part of him felt bad for using the teenager but he wanted to feel the love that was absent whenever Charles fucked him raw. In fact, it was only when Ed was with him that he felt loved at all.

Edward was sent on a mission to the town of Sorusdale at the moment so Mustang didn't expect anything else to happen during the week. Havoc was doing exceptional in therapy and he heard that by the end of the week, he would be able to join them in work although he still had to keep it easy. He could do simple reports but the prospect of having him in the office again was lifting the spirits of Roy's subordinates and he felt his heart warm at the thought.

It wouldn't have happened if Roy hadn't agreed to the proposal that Charles had set forth. In that sense he was grateful to the general but it was the only reason. There was no warmth, no feeling other than torment when he was with the man. But Roy would have done it over again if it kept the guy away from his other subordinates.

"Sir, General Mitchell wants to talk to you. Something about a work request."

Roy suppressed a shudder but stood up and made to make it to his office. He had surmised that the vomiting has only been a stomach virus since it lasted only twenty four hours and afterwards he didn't have the symptoms after that. He was glad too because he wouldn't have wanted to let Ed get the illness nor did he want the boy to see him get sick.

He was in Charles office again before he knew it. The man was looking over paperwork with the Fuhrer so Roy quickly saluted and greeted both of them. Charles smirked to his self and seemed to know something that Roy his self had no idea about. Sadly, most of his tips had come from Hughes department but since the man was no longer here, he lost a good lot of informants and although he still had some, there was no one better at getting information than the dead man. He gulped back a sob that threatened to spill every time he thought of the man.

"Nice of you to be here Colonel Mustang. Sorry, I was just telling General Mitchell about your achievements."

Roy blinked.

"You were sir?" he questioned in worry.

The Fuhrer just laughed.

"Don't worry Mustang, it was only good things. I never have many bad things to say and the general was just telling me about how you were able to turn away Fullmetal's budget problems. I quite agreed that they should have had their own funding in the beginning. Good thing we don't go broke."

Roy quietly agreed.

Mostly it was his own pocket that ensure that the Elric brothers had the money that the department lost in the overhaul. Edward has always been angry when he was told he didn't have anything but never asked where Roy got the extra money sent from whenever the man answered the stubborn teenager's request. He wouldn't tell them that though.

"It's nice to know we have you to look out for those boys health though. I was in a conversation with Millie from finance and she told me that the Colonel often made sure the boys were always taken care of. Nice to know that you act fatherly towards the boys. At one time I would have thought the lieutenant colonel was that way towards them but he's gone. Yes, I'm quite glad that somebody else took to watching the boys' backs. They're gonna need it."

Roy winced when he mentioned Hughes and nodded when the Fuhrer finished. Okay he didn't know what he meant when he said that he had taken care of the boys but he wasn't going to ask. He was unhappy with the prospect that the Fuhrer thought he was acting fatherly towards Ed. If anything, he owed Edward. The boy didn't question his need to have him and held him at night after his vivid dreams were too much.

"Well I best be going. General Mitchell probably wants to talk about the new memos," the Fuhrer added.

Both of them saluted him until the man was gone. Charles locked the door after the man before backhanding Mustang hard across the face. He didn't know what brought that on and was about to ask but before he could, he had him pinned against the wall. He backhanded him again.

"Had feelings for the dead lieutenant colonel? I bet you did."

He winced feeling Charles fingering his entrance before tearing his fingers in him. Pinned, he couldn't move. Charles let out a dry bark before letting him fall to the floor.

"You gained some weight." Mustang said nothing. The man continued seemingly angry with something. "You shouldn't get involved in other people's lives. You caused the man's death. I bet if he knew you had feelings for him then he wouldn't have been so helpful."

And even though he thought that was true, Roy couldn't help but feel differently. If he had ever known, Roy doubt the man would've even brought it up. He always seemed way too worried about his dating women without commitment. Hughes was the man that worried about if he was eating properly and always caught between trying to make him happy and giving him tips to make it to the top. He doubted the man was as Charles said.

"I think you're wrong," he whispered. Charles looked over with a dissatisfied frown. "You didn't know the lieutenant colonel and thanks to that sick motherfucker, you never will. I don't think-"

He didn't realize he had raised his voice silently until his hair was tugged and he was yanked down onto the hard wooden floor. The general looked pissed and it was all he could do to keep the guy from spitting in his face.

"Oh really? Well you don't seem to know anything. I bet he would really disapprove if he saw you now. What do you think he would do?" He forced his tongue into Roy's mouth.

Roy could've sworn he tried to gag him the way he was going on and accidentally bit down. Roy blenched when Charles got up and surveyed the blood dribbling down his face. He didn't mean it, God he didn't! But it didn't seem to make a difference for the man pulled him by his hair and rammed his head into the wall. He saw stars and when he was slammed a second time, he almost passed out.

"You little shit! Do you want to lose everything!"

"I didn't-"

Charles slammed a large sock into his mouth abruptly ending the apology. Throwing Roy on his stomach, he tore his pants down down soon followed by his boxers. Lifting he back end up, he undid his own pants before inserting his bursting cock into the entrance, ignoring Roy's muffled crying pleas. He wasted no time slamming into him and pulling out. It seemed that the two weeks he hadn't gotten any from Mustang was just too long to go without. He moaned from the intense pleasure while Roy fisted his hands from the pain.

"Like that? That's all you're good for you little slut! Don't ever forget that!" Charles yelled at him.

Roy tried to ignore the feelings of loath as the was being pounded into harshly from the backside. He couldn't help the pained cries that surfaced his throat only to be muffled from the sock. Wincing when the ramming sped up, he squeezed his eyes shut and attempted to imagine Edward doing this to him in the loving way he always did. He wasn't ever in a hurry to cum into him and instead did his best to make sure Roy loved it as well. So that when they both eventually cummed, Roy had a feeling of being complete instead of the feeling he had now of being ripped apart from the inside.

"You little bitch! How dare you think you could get away with biting! Thought you were going to bite my tongue off did ya! Well good thing nobody is going to save you!"

Finally he released his orgasm inside and it was all Roy could do not to scream as the liquid hit the newly bleeding scabs up there. Staying seated inside him, he turned Roy around and removed the sock. He was hard again damn it! Seeing as how Roy had tears running down his face, he didn't like this at all. He smirked. Nothing got to the famed colonel, hero of Ishbal. Well not anymore it didn't and Charles was glad to be the one to change that.

"Let's try this again babes. You're sorry right?" He asked watching Roy's quiet quivering.

"I'm sorry Charles. I didn't mean to bite your tongue."

Charles nodded.

"And then why did you?"

"Couldn't breathe Charles."

Charles smirked.

Forcing Roy's mouth opened, he knew the man wasn't going to try again. Pulling his cock halfway out, he slammed himself back in again watching the pained whimper that was muffled by his tongue being in the younger man's throat. Laughing quietly to his self, he slowed the pace, deciding to ride it out quite liking the pained face along with the increased grunts of pain. Moving to his throat, he bit and licked all over not liking what he found on the man's neck. Looked remarkably liked a hicky. He much liked riling up the other man like this but he had work to do and the colonel had his own.

"Name your price baby, what do you want in exchange?"

He didn't really have anything he could give him so he would leave it up to Mustang to decide. So he quickly sped up again, ramming harder each time and allowing Roy to cry out in pain. What was his covering them up going to do? Nobody was in the outer offices at the time being and as long as he didn't scream, he could allow this. Continuing, it wasn't long before he cummed inside the man again. He frowned when he pulled out and found his weeping cock lined with blood that wasn't his own.

"What was that?" Charles frowned.

"I want you to leave Edward Elric alone Charles. I made the deal with you and haven't broken a single rule. Please don't touch a single hair on him."

Charles smiled.

"So you have feelings for that little rug rat? Very well. Hell I don't care if you're sleeping with him between the times I'm with my family as long as you follow my rules. Fine granted. I won't touch a single hair. But you better promise that you'll say nothing. I don't need suspicion Mr. Mustang."

He cleaned his self up and went back to his desk ignoring the man's groans of pain. Leaving the Elric alone was a shame really. He saw the kid as beautiful really as he viewed the colonel. But he already had the colonel. He frowned. As long as the colonel was following the rules, he supposed he could allow the kid to sleep with him if he really was. But that didn't stop the jealousy from the pit of his stomach. No Mustang was better sleeping with the kid for a lack of words without any harbored feelings. He didn't need the man falling in love.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal alchemist.

Warning: Past one sided Maes/Roy. Current Roy/OC. Future Roy/Ed. Violence.

* * *

><p>FIVE<p>

For the fourth time that day, he vomited. Charles wasn't even at work but his backside still hurt from yesterday. Edward was supposed to get back to the office today and he didn't want him to see him like this. Maybe, he could also get Ed to come home with him again. Sighing, he held his stomach before weakly managing to get the bile into the toilet again.

He felt really warm as well. Taking a dry towel and drying his face with it, he looked with disdain in the mirror. It was all his fault, he reasoned. He was the weak one for allowing the general to use him every which way. If he was a good leader like his subordinates thought, he wouldn't be this weak. He sighed remembering what he did with Ed. Ed was only a teenager and he was using him for pleasure to ease the pain! The general was right about him. He caused everyone else pain so it was better to break it off before Ed died too….like Hughes did.

He flinched remembering the man. His face often haunted his dreams at night when it wasn't full of Charles or of the small face of a much younger Edward. He was too far in now but he had to think of a way to make Edward realize he wasn't just playing with him. He really did care but he couldn't do it in that way. The boy would fall in love eventually so wouldn't it stand to reason to just let him go? The boy would find someone better, another that could efficiently love him like Roy himself was unable to.

Because I locked my heart away with Hughes, he thought miserably. And now I'm in far too deep to be able to love Ed like I should. He didn't care if Ed hated him after this, he just wanted him to be safe which was why he had allowed General Mitchell to use and abuse him in the first place. He wouldn't understand either, Roy reasoned. He's young, stubborn, and most of all still pure besides the incident with human transmutation. He just needed Ed to see that too.

Grumbling, he made it to the sink and washed his mouth out with water hoping to get the nasty taste out of his mouth. He really did feel bloated as well. He had stomach cramps for the past week that he couldn't ease although compared to what Charles did with him, he felt that this was far less painful now that he thought about it. He still hurt though.

He eyed Havoc who had just made his way in and dared him to speak. The man hadn't. He just went about his business and left without a simple greeting. Roy was glad but inside he felt terrible. I'm so bad that Havoc even feels frightened of me, he thought. Better that anyways than attempting to get him killed again. He gulped and started to wipe his face next before deeming himself ready to even leave the rest rooms.

Yet he took four steps out and rushed back in feeling yet another need to empty his stomach.

* * *

><p>"MUSTANG, YOU SHOULD BE AT HOME! DON'T YOU CARE WHAT WE ALL THINK!"<p>

Roy ignored Ed.

He was loud like this most days so he was used to it. Who cared what Ed thought anyways? He was fine and he hadn't thrown up since that morning although he felt he would if the blonde even dared bring any type of greasy food in the office. He actually swore Breda triggered it the first time anyways. But he ate bread and water so he assumed he was fine. Prisoners did it and they didn't lose anything from it either, didn't they? He wouldn't know, he'd have to visit Kimblee one of these days and ask him when and if he wasn't grossed out by the maniacal man himself.

"Fullmetal did you get the objective finished?" Ed looked surprised by his changing the subject but quickly hid it.

Or so he thought he had. Roy just sighed and reasoned that maybe it was because he thought that Roy listened to his ramblings when he did them since in the past he only ever cut him off to say something relevant to what he had been babbling about.

"Colonel Shit, aren't you listening to me? You are paler than a ghost! I think you should go home and-"

"Hawkeye, please leave the room." He didn't think Hawkeye would want to sit in for this little conversation and Ed seemed to get what he meant because he waited until the room was cleared except for them.

"Roy just consider what I'm telling ya. I do care-"

"Ed," Roy sighed. This was going to be hard and he didn't think he would ever have the courage to do this but he had to. For his sake and mine, Roy thought before placing his folded hands under his chin and leant forward. "I know you care. You care a lot, maybe too much even. But we can't keep doing this Ed."

"Are you saying that you don't want to be anything with me anymore? I knew it was bad from the start because we didn't even go out but-"

Roy didn't want to hear the heartbreak the boy must be feeling right now. He didn't want him to feel anything hurtful but it happened to everybody. Roy himself felt a twinge remembering that Hughes would never love him even if he had told him how he felt, he knew Hughes would just turn him down. Roy was a man and couldn't give the guy a child. Plus he fell in love with his sweetheart Gracia and the child Elysia that they had. What more could that man ever want in life when he had that?

"I never considered that the possibility. I didn't look past the consequences and I'm sorry Ed-"

Ed turned away but he could tell that Ed was trying not to cry. How could he do this to the kid? But he had to because if not, Ed would just hurt in the end. Ed's shoulders finally shook and Roy hid his face for a moment wishing he hadn't been forced to make him cry. Ed was too young to know love though, he would find somebody worth it, he thought.

"When did you realize that you didn't want me to be anything more than a one night stand Colonel? Huh? Because that's basically what you're saying. Do you honestly not have a heart at all? Those rumors were true all along weren't they? I was just kidding before you jackass when I told you that we had proven the absence of your soul!"

Ed wasn't going to get an answer. Roy felt if he said anything then he would burst out crying. His heart was beating furiously against his rib cage as rage built up at the notion that he couldn't care less for the boy. He gave his own sacrifices and it wasn't because he hated the boy that he was breaking this off. He cared for the boy. As much as his heart could and he felt for a second time in his life, that it was breaking. After a pause of silence , he curiously thought Ed was going to stay in until he answered but that was until Ed's voice picked up again.

"Al and I are going on another mission, you hear you stupid colonel? Maybe I'll be fine or maybe this time the lead will pan out and I'll get what I need. What I don't need however much it seemed like is you. I don't really want to talk to you, hear you, nor see you. Looks like you've gotten what you want most of anything. You got promoted when I joined didn't you. I made you look good. Well I'm gonna do all I possibly can so that when the time comes, I won't have to see you ever again."

There had been so much venom that Roy almost flinched. Instead he kept his head hidden in his arms wishing he wasn't hearing all this. It was his own fault right from the start though. He brought Ed into this when he felt vulnerable and wanted somebody to have him that didn't have such cruel intent. But now, he could see why Ed would be so mad. He could see it to the bottom of his soul and every ounce hurt just as bad as the next.

The door slammed and then he couldn't help it. A loose sob racked his body, muffled by his own hand. He felt ashamed of himself more than he had truly felt in years. He did this and it was his own fault. He now truly found a way to hate himself that came further than the Ishbalan war and past his all-time love on Hughes in the past. He hated himself not because he broke up with Ed or because of the deal he had made with the general to be fucked until he screamed to protect his subordinates' lives.

For the first time since he hid his heart, he found he really did love Ed. And that alone made him burst out in tears. Because it was a love he couldn't have.

* * *

><p>Charles was early and didn't hesitate to pin his wrists above his head. Roy didn't complain though. He actually felt he deserved it. He couldn't find reason enough after what happened the day in the office when Ed had truly broke down in front of him. He tried to hide it to but he hadn't meant it to be that way. He realized to late though that he really did love the boy too and more than just any other type of friendly love. He really did love Ed! A moan of pain ripped from his throat when he felt Charles penetrating him without any type of lubricant. Let the man have his way, he thought. I'm truly and very much alone anyways, he thought. He bit his lip and closed his eyes feeling the man slam into him without mercy. Then without warning, the man backhanded him before pulling him into a rough kiss, biting his lip enough to make it bleed.<p>

"I don't know what you have been getting onto these past few days," He told him with vigor. Roy had to muffle a yelp and bit his tongue when he felt that it wouldn't be enough. Charles just laughed lightly before continuing. "You are much more listless than usual meaning you act like your dog just died."

Roy didn't say anything and ended up getting backhanded once again. What was he supposed to say? That he fell in love with another person? That the best thing in the world, Roy had had it at the tip of his fingers and he had let it slip past him forever? Roy once again bit his lip when Charles picked up speed. He couldn't bite his own knuckles since Charles had handcuffed him to the head mattress. Charles chuckled in his ears, tickling them with his breath. He felt his waist being lifted for what he could only assume was better angling but it actually felt somewhat enjoyable for he out out a surprised gasp which wasn't pain filled for once.

Charles chuckled again.

"You gained a little more weight since the last time I saw ya. What was it, five days ago? You have a little belly on you as well." He slammed into him even faster than before, only adding with a a voice of disgust when he slowed down a bit. "Your belly could pass as my wife's when she was four months pregnant with my girls but of course she was carrying two. I don't want you carrying anything in there of course cause then it would be no fun and you could actually get knocked up."

He released his seed in his and then stood up with a smile before leaning over and pulling him into a searing kiss.

"Remember what I told you about sharing?"

Roy hadn't realized what he was getting at since the man was always so overly jealous that it was often times not even funny. The man suddenly removed the handcuffs but restrained his wrists before he could move them. This took the Roy by surprise but Charles only reattached them once they were behind his back. Once satisfied, Charles stood back before continuing.

"My best buddy has been lonely and you know what, he isn't alone. He has a boyfriend but they always do stuff together. I owe him big time though so I thought why not share a hot young man who just knows how to give a good time…"

He trailed off but Roy was already fighting to get away. He was backhanded once again and pressed hard against the mattress. He wince feeling that the man was just turned on about this more than anything and had been the only reason why he had agreed to it at all. The man grinned seeing Roy grimace before attacking his lips.

"You do want me to leave your coworkers alone don't you?"

Roy froze before going slack in his arms, allowing all resistance to leave his body. Charles grinned before leaving him alone for the time being. In his mind however, he was panicking. Did that mean they were going to do it TOGETHER together? Or were they going to do it first one or the other? He didn't want to get the answer right away but he had his hands behind his back and his subordinates were once again threatened if he backed out. He could do this, he told himself. All he had to do was imagine someone else was doing this to him and he was enjoying it.

He let out a squeak when he felt not one finger but two enter him and laughter from behind him. The two were already here! He didn't even notice Charles allowing them in. He tried to remain calm but it seemed his worst nightmare was coming true. When he felt double the digits stretching him, he bit down on his lip to keep from screaming out in pain. He really thought they would stop at two fingers each but never thought both men would add the third. A scream really did tear his throat this time but the men just laughed.

"I don't care either way honey. I would rather you be noisy anyways cause it lets me know I'm doing good."

The other stranger grinned as well but Roy couldn't really get used to the pain. He squirmed but the other one held him down with only one hand. He was now more determined to fight than ever and momentarily forgot about the deal but if Charles was going to get him on it, the thinner of the men there put a hand up to stop him.

"Come on, if he's fighting, he's got life in him. He's not exactly willing so it's alright."

They seemed to think Charles shouldn't just be watching the show but Roy was at least glad that the man didn't think so. It got worse when the first one plunged into him. Once the first was to the hilt, Roy began to breathe easier until the second man thrust in almost tearing him in two. He couldn't hide it that time and screamed in agony. It only seemed to get them more turned on than before. One of them put a hand on his back before they slowly began to thrust in and out. Roy fisted the sheets screaming while his mouth made words that he couldn't seem to say. Mostly he would reckon later would have to do with Ed.

Don't pay attention, he attempted to think. The pain is tremendous but just remember the sweet love you made with Ed, he'd love it. It was no use for every time each of them moved, it brought waves of severe pain in which he was unable to relax. The men complained that he was tight as well but didn't seem to bothered by it because they kept slamming into him without mercy, ignoring his pained screams. His vision even wavered at one part and he swore that he would pass out until one of them pinched him in the side really hard. When they finally cummed together inside of him, it was burning the insides and he didn't doubt that if he got up just now, he'd find blood. Charles unhooked the handcuffs but Roy didn't think he could get up either. He just lay there, ragged breathing and it seemed that finally someone respected him enough to say something.

"Uh, Lenny he looks really pale and it seems we kinda, uh hurt him this way."

Charles chuckled away though.

"He is always that pale!"

"Is he always bleeding like this though?"

It seemed like a minute before Charles suddenly saw that and shook his head. They probably were admitting right now that they went too far with this little thing. They were a bit brutal and the man was paying for it right now. Roy finally went to sit up ignoring the biting pain in his rear and found himself blacking out. Lying back down, he made sure he was on his left side since he was not comfortable on his right side at all for some reason.

"Hey Howard, we just nailed a fatty!"

Roy ignored the men's laughter for the favor of just catching his breath. Slowly, he realized it wasn't much him getting his breath as the tiredness was causing his eye lids to grow heavy. He was almost out when he felt another backhand and groaned loudly with displeasure.

"Idiot, stay up! You're lip is turning blue!"

He couldn't really understand. Then again the men stopped laughing altogether as well. Charles, it seemed, was making sure he wasn't bleeding anymore and Roy thought he wasn't since the man was smiling again. He froze though and Roy couldn't understand what was going on. Charles ignored him to place his clothes on, with both Howard and Lenny helping with the socks and shoes. He didn't understand why they were going out, he was just a casual fuck, not somebody that they would be willing to date afterwards. He was a horrible date. They only had to ask Edward, he was hated by that boy.

But they didn't take him where he thought they would. It was to the hospital. He looked up to Charles in worry. Why would they take him here. The two men that had come over only invited by Charles left just as quickly as they had come. He blinked but the nurse seemed to think this was urgent and lifted him into the stretcher. He felt Charles put his lips close to his ears and almost laughed, it tickled so much.

"Don't tell them about this. If they ask, you were raped and I found you."

Roy found himself nodding although he could barely understand. His world was becoming fuzzy as well. He could barely see the man let alone where he was going. When it went all black, he suddenly reached out and grabbed his hand.

"Don't go!" He suddenly yelped and he couldn't see what the reaction was but he didn't go. He would have felt his hand letting him go if he had. He was appeased at least. He would have really wanted Edward but it looked like he wasn't going to be getting him anytime soon.

He whimpered.

"Ed."

He could've sworn that he heard a gasp but he didn't know.

"Ed, please don't go," he continued. He didn't know who was there anymore and just wanted the boy there even though he hated him so much. "Edward, please I really do love you. I lied when I told you to leave."

He didn't know where everyone was and could feel himself panicking. The hand let go of his too and he had really wanted that warmth. Before he could continue panicking, he felt a small jab and felt his eyelids close against their will. Weird, was his last thought. I thought they already were. He was out like a light then without awareness to light or sound.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA.

Warning: Past onesided Maes/Roy, current Ed/Roy

* * *

><p>SIX<p>

Ed sighed whilst watching the man sleep. It had been days since he had been here. At first he was damning Al for allowing him to try to help the woman get her cat from a tree. Thanks to that he had hurt his arm but when he got his arm taken care of at the hospital, which as it turned out wasn't bad at all and was only a laceration that only needed glue and a Band-Aid. They were ready to leave was when he saw the Colonel again but he looked like shit. The man didn't want him to let go of his hand either so here he was, even though he had to temporarily let go so that they could bring the bleeding under control and gave him oxygen right away.

The rest as they say was history.

The man had slipped into a coma not too long after being admitted. The pressure in his brain had decreased though and the doctors had reassured him that he would wake up soon. The General who brought him in hadn't been seen again though which he was glad. The man couldn't be trusted was Ed's general impression and it was usually accurate. He only moved for the past several days to shower and use the toilet however it seemed like he would be here months if Roy didn't wake up now.

"When are you going to wake up? Don't you realize you missed a weeks' worth of paperwork that you will have to stay after work for up to at least half a month in order to catch up? Roy wake up and speak with me. You said that you lied when you said you didn't love me and I want to know why you said those things in the first place. Okay?"

It didn't make a difference since he was still the same as ever although his color was getting better. He winced seeing as how he had needles in his arms. One arm had the I.V. that was keeping him hydrated whilst in the other arm was the transfusion line whereas he was getting his blood replenished because according to the doctor, he was way too anemic even before coming into the emergency room. Ed frowned when they listed the injuries that he had knowing that there had been a reason he was way too pale. He had gained weight though and he had a small bump which they were going to see to soon with an ultra sound system.

"Why can't you wake up Colonel? We need to have a proper talk this time and I for one am not going to listen to any lame ass bull shit excuses anymore."

He was interrupted in his thoughts by seeing Havoc at the door. He still didn't release his grip on the comatose man's hand although he knew that the other man was just as worried. He walked over and fell into a chair right beside Ed, silently looking over his boss. He had a non-rebreather mask over his nose and mouth to help him get adequate oxygen. He had previously been intubated when he came in but with the improvement, he no longer needed that anymore. There were bruises up and down his torso although they were absent on his limbs but that didn't make a difference. Roy had still been severely hurt.

"What do you think happened to him?" Ed finally asked aloud. "He's in a coma Havoc and I'm afraid that he will never wake up. Why wouldn't he say if he were hurt? What would come out of it?"

Havoc didn't want to scare the other, he really didn't but seeing a human sized bite mark on their bosses neck as well as all the other injuries, he would chalk it up to something violent. But the only thing they knew so far was that there had been a bleed, it had stopped, and he was severely anemic. So far in fact that they needed to replenish his red blood cells. Also was the fact that he had such a hard time taking in breath that they were suspicious of the other minor injuries in comparison as well.

"They still haven't tested fully though," Havoc reminded him and Ed let out a sigh.

The doctors had done a lot of labs although they looked upset when they were done and had allowed Ed back into the room. What did the man do that caused him to be into this condition. Havoc was still using a cane but he was ambulatory and no longer in the need of a wheel chair which was great by comparison. But it didn't make it worth it if something were to happen to Mustang because his subordinates wouldn't hesitate to lay themselves on the line for him and Havoc did ending up doing just that almost dying for the man. It seemed to have been eating him up since then though and Havoc never wanted that.

The doctor entered followed by an ultrasound like he had promised. First checking all his interventions, he was assured that they were fine. He brought the sheet down and squeezed some gel onto the bump, placing the probe onto it afterwards. Spreading the gel around the abdomen with the probe, he squinted, and then seemed to be shocked seeing the thing on the screen. Ed craned his neck to see what the image was but the doctor turned it over to help him. Ed was in shock seeing that it had to be impossible. It could not be a little tiny baby! But that seemed the case and it was moving its arms and legs, wiggling around every which way.

"Whose baby would that be?" Ed asked aloud.

"Well he may be anywhere from four months to four in a half maybe even five if I were to go by the measurements." He continued telling him how he got the approximate gestational age whilst Ed looked a little crestfallen. It wasn't his baby and couldn't possibly be since the first time he had done it with the man had been a month ago. He was already vomiting though and already gaining weight around the middle a little as well.

He remembered thinking about the strange things that Mustang was saying and chalked it up to him being weird and needy but what if there was someone that was wanting the man out of lust? Did that mean that the baby hadn't been made with love? He thought it sad since the baby was obviously not going to be in a happy home life that way.

The doctor had removed the ultrasound after taking several pictures, telling them the plan to insert a feeding tube if he didn't wake up soon. The baby was going to suffer from malnutrition though and the doctor didn't want that.

After the doctor left the room, Havoc turned to Ed.

"Is it yours? It would make it less complicated if it were-"

"It's not." Ed seemed put out that the man had never told him but shrugged in the end although he was certainly bothered to learn that. "He's farther along than he would've been if it were mine."

Havoc nodded but didn't seem disgusted with the fact that Ed basically admitted being with Roy sexually. At least he hoped that Roy wasn't regretting being with the person he had made the baby with. That was just wrong. Before they could talk more, General Mitchell had come in and they stood to salute, Ed awkwardly holding the man's hand still. He put them at ease and they dropped back down to their seats. He took a look at Mustang and even though he made no expression, he asked them what was going on with him.

"He's been in a comatose state since he had been brought in. There was a buildup of fluid in his brain at the beginning but it receded on its own apparently, oh and he's pregnant."

The man seemed surprised but Ed couldn't blame him. It was odd seeing as how the baby's paternity was unknown. He meant to say something when he felt the hand he was holding tighten his. Seeing that he was close to waking up, he gave General Mitchell a small smile whilst trying to remain calm.

Something told him that he shouldn't have told him that Roy was carrying a baby.

* * *

><p>It was a week when he was out and Charles had seemed angry although he assured him that it had nothing to do with him outright. His wife had left during the night and took his daughters with her like he knew she would. Seeing as how the mansion was now empty, he singlehandedly invited Roy there and instead of bending him over and taking him in any way he pleased like Roy thought he would, they started out with eating dinner.<p>

It was soon followed by bouts of vomiting in which Roy reassured him it would go away soon and it only lasted for at the most ten minutes. After Roy recovered, they played chess for an hour with Roy winning ten of the eleven games they had been playing. Charles didn't seem angry throughout the game and he supposed that it had put him into a false sense of security since he was beginning to relax. Charles even joked that he would have given him wine if he hadn't been carrying an baby in his tummy.

Afterwards though, he led him upstairs and made him lay on the bed. Roy didn't know what he was planning until he had him remove his shirt and lay down. Roy did as he was told wondering what he was going to do until he took Roy's wrists and held them above his head and with a clank, slapped the handcuffs onto them. Roy didn't really want to know how the rest would play out until he felt Charles ravishing his neck with small bites and kisses. Afterwards he gave him one look and Roy didn't know what it meant until he spoke up.

"Open your mouth," he ordered and Roy listened, opening it for as long as he could, only closing it for a second before opening it again.

Charles unzipped his own pants before removing his hardened member slick with precum from the fold in his boxers. He slipped his member into Roy's mouth giving him the look and Roy began to suck swirling his tongue and making Charles groan in pleasure.

"Bob your head," he ordered so Roy did as he asked without question. He let Roy set his own pace for the moment but didn't hesitate in telling him to go faster finally gripping his head when Roy failed to go fast enough to please him. He cummed in his mouth, happy that the man had swallowed most of it before removing his member from Roy's sweet mouth.

He backhanded him, giving a smirk when he saw that Roy was surprised.

"Don't think just because it turns out that you're carrying my child that I would go easy on you. I actually preferred that you didn't carry my child since it would be a bastard baby anyways. I hate the thought that I'm going to be a parent to such a child. What we do isn't love, it's what you owe me to keep you're subordinates safe but I guess if a teen could get knocked up for drinking and partying you could too. I bet it's going to be beautiful."

He stopped long enough to stroke Roy's stomach seeing as how it was growing in his belly more now that Roy was farther along. Whether he was going to have the baby, Charles didn't care. The man was at the most six months now and even though he was happy it was him and not the blonde brat, he didn't think he would be able to love another child besides his girls.

Pulling Roy's pants and boxers off, he smiled when he saw a trace of fear lingering in those eyes. He didn't care about the man's feelings and instead took a tube of lube from his pocket, spreading it on his fingers before inserting one, and caused the other to jump before he held his hips still. He didn't really find scissoring his entrance worth it but the man wasn't going back to the hospital for anemia again if he could help it. Once he determined that he was prepped enough, he lathered his own once again hardened member pushing it past the ring of muscles and didn't hesitate to begin pounding him. Roy closed his eyes not liking the fact that he wasn't rough like he used to be. It hurt far more in comparison to now but the man was acting like he was making love to him instead of brutally raping him to buy his silence.

Charles cummed inside him and pulled out. He lay there for a moment before removing the handcuffs and getting him to move to his knees with his hands on the bedrails. Once Roy done what he asked, he felt a small amount of pressure from behind him and forced himself to relax so that he wouldn't scream out in pain. Charles was holding onto his hips and ramming into him fast and hard. One of the spots he hit caused Roy to release a startled moan making the other man crack a grin behind him.

"See, I'm that good. If I took you as my lover I'd show you how to feel good more often but I'm not. As for your kid, you better not tell anyone of its paternity and we'll be fine. Let's just say that I'm it's uncle because I still get some rights. Oh and once it's born I'm not gonna be fucking you anymore so we'll just keep two secrets as well."

He finally cummed inside him again before slipping out. The phone rang keeping Charles from continuing what he was going to tell him. He frowned heavily before turning to Roy.

"Get out! I'll call you when I want to see you next."

Roy nodded, quickly putting his clothes back on but he paused at the door hearing the little voice that had to have belonged to one of Charles's daughters.

"I love you daddy. Mommy is going to let us come down and see you after she is done being mad. She says you don't spend enough time with her-"

Not being able to stand listening to an innocent child's wishful thinking, he quickly left. If that was how it was going to be with his own child's real father, he would rather not say who the real father was in the first place.

* * *

><p>Roy hated feeling fat.<p>

Looking at the mirror he realized to his horror that he was humongous. It didn't stop him from going to work though and people often thought his weight gain was because he was lazing about and called him on it as well. It wasn't until his predicament that Roy realized how cruel some people could be. If Hughes had been here…..He paused at that thought , closing his eyes momentarily trying not to open back up those can of worms. Instead, he jumped a little when the baby felt it nice enough to jab him in the ribs, making him double over for a good minute.

That was when he saw the General and quickly tried to straighten up. It made no use, he motioned him to follow behind and with a small sigh escaping his lips, Roy did what he was told. Once the door was closed behind him, he saw that Charles was frowning at his stomach. Roy didn't know why because the doctor was saying he was doing nicely and the baby was normal sized. A good whopping five in a half pounds. He couldn't see why the man was frowning.

"You're thirty one and three days, what are you doing here?"

Roy made a o shape with his mouth quickly realizing why he was mad. He didn't know why because he had stated he wasn't interested in caring for the child at all except for occasional visits to see if the child was still breathing. Ed had gotten his talk through and he said that once he came back from his lead they were going to talk more. So basically it was a talk to have a bigger talk which would have been only okay but Ed sealed it with a kiss making it even better. They were unofficially dating as of now and since he wasn't mad that the kid he was carrying wasn't his, he believed he finally found someone in Ed.

"I'm not having the baby for another four weeks so I'll be fine to work today," he tried to reassure him.

"You're not only wrong but you are too fat! My wife was your size at this far along and she was carrying twins! What does that tell you? Huh?"

Roy didn't want to tell him what he thought that meant because he would be basically calling that woman a fat pig. He thought about the woman who used the man's twin girls to control him and to get what she wanted from the man she had married. He really did find the worst person ever and couldn't help but feel a small stab of pity. Feeling another jab towards his ribs, he winced before he could stop himself. Charles frowned again but seemed to decide that if Roy wanted to suffer than he would do what he wanted.

"What are you going to tell them about the father?" He was always really curious about the story that Roy had planned out.

"Oh his or her daddy was a fling I had months ago and he died in a car accident a couple of months before I found out. Simple really. Oh and you and him are brothers. You said you wanted to be thought of as an uncle so I just did what you told me to." Charles nodded.

Honestly he did have a brother and whilst his parents had passed away from some sort of incident back when he was five, his brother was killed in ironically a car accident. He had several living brothers though and it would be hard to find out that he was when Roy told such a diverse story. He let him at it though.

"Oh and I'm dating now."

Charles frown deepened greatly.

"Nice. Tell you're date that they have your whole heart. Make sure that you get married and have lots of babies that are actually his-"

"I think I'll only have one if he asks." Roy told him. "I don't think I want many babies anyways. But he has missions to go on and a brother to restore before all that happens."

"Of course."

There was silence when Roy chose to speak up again.

"I know you don't regret doing what you did and I know I won't ever forget but for whatever it's worth, thank you for saving Havoc and protecting my subordinates no matter what the cost was."

Charles nodded.

It was rather awkward now. He had in the beginning said that he would be able to change any rule as he saw fit but seeing as how he messed up and gotten the man knocked up, he realized one thing. He couldn't even keep his own family together. Roy in a way had made him see that he wasn't being fair to her. He made it up the ranks but in the start they had been absolutely in love and it was pure. Once the girls were born he was so proud that he had had two little angels and his wife was crying tears of happiness for all of them. It slowly began going sour when King Bradley wanted him to do everything and anything taking him into his work and away from his family. He honestly missed that, the connection he had had with her. He really wanted to talk to her so bad. He honestly didn't regret doing what he did like Roy had said but if he knew his little miracle could happen he would have worn a condom.

"Just don't deliver at work."

Roy nodded seeing the boxes finally.

"Are you leaving?" he asked and Charles gave him a look. He hoped that the man had a very bratty daughter. Techniqually she would be his too but he would never see her and he hoped she was a very big brat that always asked questions.

"I'm going to retire." At Roy's dubious look he sighed. "I'm going to do what I should have done all those months ago. I'm going to leave the military and raise my girls, be there for them, and reconnect with my wife. We used to know each other more but being with you, I realized I had a problem sometime in between. She's willing to let me make it up to her. For what it's worth thanks."

Roy stared at the outstretched hand before shaking it. His baby seemed to be doing summersaults in his belly and he knew if it kept up he would have to go to the bathroom again. Charles seemed to find the humor in it and Roy gave a tiny laugh before saluting him.

"Good luck General."

"Get out of here. I know you have paperwork."

"That's because I always have it." Now that he wasn't at the man's mercy, he could truly see how he could have come to respect the man.

Waving one last time, he made his way out of the office wondering why he never thought of the man that way. He was ruthless and cruel showing no mercy what so ever but even he had feelings of his own. He didn't know if he was ready to forgive the man but he was willing to at least try. Maybe it would be fine when he was no longer in the army and was happy with his family.

He allowed a smile stepping out of the office. He could finally see things looking up from now. Months ago he thought he really wasn't going to get to this point but he had. Another kick to the ribs and he realized he had the thought too soon. Whoever was doing the shots to the ribs would be grounded as soon as they were born he thought.

Even if they were an innocent kicking baby it still hurt!

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><p>AN: Please review and tell me what you think!


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA.

Warning: Past onesided Maes/Roy, current Ed/Roy.

* * *

><p>SEVEN<p>

Ed had come back.

Roy noticed finally after waking up from his nap. He noticed he had drooled on some of his paperwork but just wiped it off. It would dry eventually so why care about a little drool? Yawning, he placed the piles he completed in the pile to the right side with all the others he had already done. He was tired, the baby was kicking and now Ed was demanding answers. He gave him a look as though to tell him to go away so he could get some more sleep. The blonde didn't budge at all though.

Ed glared at Roy tapping his foot as he waited for his unasked answer. The man sighed and leant back, throwing his feet up on his desk. He could hardly stay comfortable these days since the baby was making it impossible for him to sleep and he couldn't find a comfortable spot for long either thanks to the weight in his front. The other subordinates had stepped out to allow him to talk it out with Ed. That was really nice of them, Roy thought with sarcasm. Al was with them and he could have sworn he was giving Ed a look when he had thought that he wasn't looking.

Finally he got tired of the look Ed was giving him for the last fifteen minutes and snapped.

"What Ed? I swear if you don't talk to me-"

"Why'd you say you didn't love me when you did? Why didn't you tell me you were hurting? I love you way too damn much to be caring that you were knocked up from someone in the past Mustang! So what, are you with that person now? You were in a previous relationship and you got out of it right? I could only take so much at one time you know! I have to still restore Al, it's my promise and I have to do that for him but can you please tell me why you would do that? If you say that you were trying to protect me then don't do it! I knew how to protect myself since I was younger than now and I don't need a protector. If you don't love me say so now so that I don't have to feel the hurt a second time."

Roy knew that Ed was trying to remain strong, he loved him for his stubbornness but he also knew that the boy couldn't handle a broken heart. Not like he would lie to him though. Leaning forward, he beckoned Ed with his finger until he was just inches from his face.

"Ed, you may not like this but all adults act stupid sometimes and even I'm no exception. I had a previous relationship but that's over now. The man I was with had been in a fatal car accident before I even found out the reason I was so chubby. I know you have to restore Al, I promised to give you the resources to help remember? I know you and I know you're mind. If I only did this out of protection, I wouldn't put up with your shit for so long before kicking you to the curb. You are strong and have been like you said, a little kid. No matter what anyone else says you have been through a lot and have come out a lot stronger than ever before. Don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise, you are a strong soul." Up until now he avoided the love subject and could see Ed getting antsy. He hid a smile and seeing how Ed seemed disappointed he wasn't going to bring up another subject, he captured his lips in a heated kiss with Ed moving his hand through Roy's hair as he deepened the kiss.

He broke it to catch his breath and saw Ed smile although he looked a little worried.

"I do love you Ed. I don't know when I did but I will always love you and I can't stand the thought of living without you. I know the baby isn't yours so you don't have any responsibilities to it whatsoever-"

Ed broke him off with another kiss, having made his way around the desk while he was talking. Deepening it, his palms were on both sides of the man's loveable baby face. He really did love the man. Did he really think the baby not being his would change that fact any? So what. His biological father had had two wonderful children and he was a horrible figure to them. He believed if anything, he would be better than Hoenhiem. Leaning forward, he didn't see Roy complaining to him being on his lap despite the lack of room. He didn't know how Roy felt about the pregnancy but he knew for one that it had to have been tiring carrying it around in the last trimester knowing his front had to weigh at least a ton now. Ignoring the thoughts about the baby for now, he started suckling on his neck soliciting a moan from the other man.

He would have continued though when Roy let out a gasp and quickly pushed him off. Ed hid the hurt and after a moment, Roy shook it off. He really thought that Roy was hurting really bad for a second but Roy tried to push it off as normal. He did know that Roy was getting kicks to the ribs often and assumed it was one of those, quickly leading Roy to the couch. He really didn't think sex would be beneficial at the later stages of pregnancy but he did know that making out wasn't out. Staying mindful of his stomach, he laughed when Roy still found that their fit on the couch was compromised by his stomach.

"My have you hit the gym lately?" Ed asked and Roy glared up at him only to let out another gasp holding his abdomen.

The laughter ceased and Ed looked confused. How long had Roy been feeling the pain. Sighing, he helped him to stand and seeing as how every minute he seemed to be experiencing the same pain, he felt a visit to the hospital was in order.

"Come on to the hospital-DAMN IT MUSTANG!"

"OW! OKAY THAT SMARTS! NOBODY SAID THAT THIS WOULD HURT!"

"THEY NEVER TOLD YOU ABOUT THE HORRORS OF CHILDBIRTH THEN!"

That got the rest of them running in and even Al looked shocked seeing as how Roy was bent over his brother and seemed to be trying to ward off the pain. It obviously wasn't working. Hawkeye sighed and moved Ed out of the way. But when she reached for his pants, he glared at her making her glare at him.

"Sir, you should have read up on childbirth. Where do you think the baby comes from?"

Roy turned bright pink but shook his head.

"Get me to the hospital!" Havoc laughed at that until Ed nudged him with his elbow. He didn't think that Roy's pain was quite funny even though the other guy seemed it hilarious that the past player was knocked up and having a baby in the office.

"I was trying to see how far along the baby was sir."

"Thirty one and three days. I shouldn't even be having the baby! Not due for another four weeks," Hawkeye seemed annoyed with his whining already.

"Fine, Breda get the car started. Havoc, you are going to make sure that the rest stay in gear unless you want to switch-" Havoc was happy to stay behind for once and quickly dashed away. Al helped Ed with getting Roy to the vehicle seeing as how he was still taller than Ed and he gained thirty five pounds as well now.

Once they were in the vehicle, Roy let a small shout tear from him throat, grabbing onto Ed's sleeve for reassurance. Ed gave him a simple look finally realizing that he should have made Roy go home and watched him. Although it was kind of a blessing they were in the office because the hospital was definitely closer. The baby was really wanting to see the world and Ed was happy that Roy didn't mind letting him be here for the baby's birth.

He could only hope that Roy eased up on the hand he was squeezing before he lost all feeling in it.

* * *

><p>The contractions were way too close together for drugs but with the fact that the water didn't break yet, The doctor was talking about breaking it. Roy was already in too much pain but wouldn't let anyone touch him at first. The doctor sighed before claiming that he could have fun going through the nature of childbirth himself. Roy finally listened after a rather strong one ripped through his body.<p>

He wanted to curse Charles. It hurt so much and he hadn't known it was this painful before. True he hadn't ever asked but it still hurt like hell! Ed was laughing and telling him to calm down but he still gasped when the doctor had Ed help remove his pants and boxers. It helped that there was at least a sheet over him but he didn't want everyone in there.

"Out! Out! OUT! THE ONLY PEOPLE THAT SHOULD BE IN HERE ARE THE ONES THAT WORK HERE AND ED!"

Ed was touched that he had and laughed when the doctor stuck a finger into the opening where the baby was coming. He couldn't stand it for much longer and wanted him to pull out the two fingers he had in there, groaning loudly in pain.

The doctor eventually did only to accept the tool that the nurse had handed him making Roy freak out more. Sighing, he turned to Ed and tried to explain to him because the knucklehead seemed to not know how to listen very well. He had to pop the water so that delivery could come sooner and that the pain would end sooner. If he wanted to go another six hours, he would be fine with it. He began to say how the military is paying for the baby being born anyways and that if Roy wanted to draw it out, well that was more money to the hospital.

"Fine, just be quick about it," Ed laughed but Roy had taken to grabbing his hand and biting onto his knuckles causing Ed to withdraw it in pain. Not having Ed's hand to squeeze onto anymore, he grabbed fistfuls of the sheets, whilst the doctor advanced it in, causing a rush of fluids not too long afterward. Roy felt wrong, like he had just wet himself but the doctor was already about to check when he saw the advancement of the head. It sure didn't take long for the baby to get into the opening. Roy certainly didn't seem to like it, but he was the one squeezing it out.

Ed let him have his own hand back which he grabbed onto feeling the contractions getting stronger. The doctor explained to him about the importance of bearing down and pushing but Roy was too far in pain to really listen outright and only finally did when it was getting unbearable. The doctor had him pause in the pushing to get the cord that was wrapped around the babies neck untangled. He suctioned her little mouth and nose as she let out her first strangled cry. Her screaming was definitely loud although Roy was busy pushing the rest of her out but once the shoulders had been freed, it was easier after that. Finally she was out and the nurse gestured to Ed to cut the cord. Ed looked surprised but Roy had let go of his hand and Ed hesitantly did.

The nurse weighed the baby and did the foot and hand stamps, cleaning it up before finally wrapping her into a blanket. Handing her off to Ed, he was surprised how much like Roy she actually was. She didn't really have his eye color, it was a deep brown and her hair was his but not really his color. It was brown. However she definitely had his baby face and that alone was a miracle in itself.

He went over to Roy and although he poked her cheek and made her cry, he made no offer to hold her. Unbeknownst to him, no matter what, he couldn't find himself holding her at first. She was the child made from rape and although he had had her going through a tremendous amount of pain, he still found himself unable to truly look at the child. She was pretty and okay so she was really adorable but he couldn't look her in the face right now.

Ed frowned but didn't say anything more. The nurse motioned for the baby and Ed handed her over watching the baby instantly cry. Ed let her go with reluctance before turning to the man he loved dearly. He realized it must be hard for him since the man that had had a hand in making her was not here. He had to snap him out of it and quick.

"Roy I know that it's hard but we'll get through that. She'll have a daddy and you'll always be so good that she'll be the best little girl you knew. She will grow up to be strong and fair because it'll be you raising her."

Roy finally nodded.

"Maybe it would help to love her more if you named her."

Ed brought up a good point. What would he name the baby? He wasn't going to make it start with a C for obvious reason and he didn't want it to be a common name like Marie or Maria. Hell even Charles had named his little girl Maria. He finally got it seeing as how it was not popular, nobody he saw went around with a name like that and it was rather unique.

"Mayleigh Isabella." Ed gave him a look but seemed to like it himself.

"So you're going for the name that hardly anybody has? Not anybody I know but I think it's a winner."

Roy nodded although he still felt a bit guilty that he hadn't wanted to hold her. Ed probably thought he couldn't stand the fact that she looked so much like the one he made up but it wasn't the case. She had no features he could see from the man. Closing his eyes, he wondered if he was being cruel to the little girl. She didn't ask for this and she wasn't even able to have a say in anything.

"Hey, Roy my brother wants to see Mayleigh. Is that okay?"

Roy nodded again without hesitation and Ed, happy about a baby he hadn't even fathered, gave him a kiss on the cheek before taking off. Hawkeye and Breda smiled as they entered, taking seats beside the bed. Roy didn't know whether he should call Charles about the baby's birth or not but he had made it pretty clear he didn't want the little baby in his life. He was okay with that. Mayleigh would never know her father but she would know Ed and that was just as good if not better.

"So was it painful?" Breda suddenly asked.

Hawkeye sighed and threw a book at the man for asking such a question. Of course it was painful, it was childbirth and she doubt that they let him have medication so late in the labor. She saw a glimpse of the baby and even though she looked more like the other parent, Hawkeye knew that both Ed and Roy was going to love that girl very much. It would just take a little time on Roy's part but soon she would have him wrapped around her little finger.

"Of course NOT! I just pushed something the size of one of those watermelons out of something the size of a potato. See that wouldn't hurt at all!"

Breda just chuckled at his boss's sarcasm.

"Have fun with the post-partum depression sir."

"I AM NOT GETTING THAT! I AM A MAN! SURE I MAY HAVE GOTTEN PREGNANT AND HAD A BABY BUT I'M PUTTING THAT STUFF BEHIND ME! YOU HEAR ME!"

One thing was certain. He was still their fearless leader before all this happened but one thing they still wondered about a considerable amount even though they would never meet them was the father. He never gave a name but told them that he had died in a car accident months ago. They didn't know whether to even buy that but something told them to at least give a benefit of the doubt to the man so they did.

At least everything appeared to be normal again with their boss.

* * *

><p>It was a few weeks later and Roy still blatantly refused to hold the child. He tried to get over the fact of who her father was but all he could think about was the pain while he looked at her. Ed was getting tired taking care of the baby by himself and he wished he could just help him. It would have been better if he had let her get adopted by nice people that would love her and not think of the months of rape every time that he saw her. She really was an innocent child so he couldn't understand why he was failing in being able to hold her. The baby was cute but even he couldn't find himself picking her up in the first place.<p>

Ed kept trying though and wouldn't give up. He understood thinking that Roy probably didn't want to hold her with the fear that he would break her. It couldn't be about the father because Roy had declared she didn't have any of his features that Roy could see. If there were others, it wasn't obvious so Ed kept trying to find openings in which he would get the man to accept the baby. It turned out to fail each and every time so far.

Sighing Ed had decided to try to give him even more time to get over whatever it was, but he just knew he would have to push him into holding the baby. Roy certainly wasn't showing anything. So instead, he tried to get Roy to at least spend more time with him and have the baby around so that he could get used to seeing her around. He groaned when he saw that he avoided looking at her. Did he really not like her that much? Sighing, he still tried to help him. Mayleigh deserved to be loved by both of them not just him.

Later that night, he sighed seeing as how Roy wouldn't touch his two month old daughter, refused to hold her, and blatantly ignored her cries. They were in bed and Ed really wasn't all that tired and seeing as how Roy didn't seem to be either, he wondered if he should bring up who she would stay with until he got back. Damn the kid wasn't even his and he couldn't trust her biological parent to take care of Mayleigh when he was away. Turning over, he found himself accidentally with his lips pressed to the other man.

He didn't really think Roy was ready sexually. He shied away from any and all contact that was more than a good night kiss in bed. Roy let him kiss him though and snuggled into him. Ed nibbled on his bottom lip seeking entrance. Usually Roy wanted to stop right there but tonight he opened his mouth letting Ed stick his tongue in. Exploring the warm cavern, he slipped his hands on Roy's shirt resting his hands on his sides. Deepening the kiss he slipped his shirt off, trailing wet kisses down his body. Roy moaned and taking that as a hint, he slipped his pants down, glad that Roy was responding better. He didn't know why he hadn't in the beginning. He pulled his boxers down to his ankles and poured lotion onto his fingers. He pushed a lubricated finger in Roy's entrance hearing the intake of breath deciding to go a little slower. He didn't want Roy backing out.

After getting up to the third, he pulled out a condom seeing as how Roy refused to let that happen again anytime soon. The only way other than abstinence was the condoms. Rolling it on, he also lubricated to make it easier on him. He was about to push in when Roy pulled him down to kiss him. Ed looked at him in confusion before pushing his member into Roy, not waiting to for him to back out again. He waited for him to get used to the intrusion before beginning to pull half way out. He started at a slow pace not realizing he didn't enjoy it right away. Ed stopped trying to get him into it like he had been in the best but it became apparent that he still hadn't been ready. He quickly pulled out and threw the condom in the trash. Giving him a simple kiss on the cheek, he went off to the bathroom to get rid of his problem.

The last thing on his mind though was the state of Roy's mind. He acted like someone that was tortured and couldn't seem to enjoy it at all. He hoped that once he got back from one of his missions that it would be different.

* * *

><p>AN: Please review and tell me what you think!


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA.

Warning: Past onesided Maes/Roy, current Ed/Roy. Flashbacks to rape.

* * *

><p>EIGHT<p>

It turned out that Ed didn't have the time to find anybody to watch the little girl. So the next day Ed brought her over in her car seat and handed the bag to a reluctant Roy who was already trying to back out of his responsibility. Ed no longer felt guilty about leaving her with him deciding that this was the push Roy would need to accept his two month old. Ed wasn't going to be with her all the time since he wouldn't take her on missions and her papa would have to learn to take care of her. Not that he would let her loose on an unsuspecting Roy all the way though and asked his subordinates to help him out only if Roy panicked and suffered a nervous breakdown. Now though Roy had her on the opposite side of the room hoping she wouldn't cry. Ed said that he had to make sure she was alive and healthy by the time he got back but Roy was finding it hard to even get near her.

He made his way over seeing as how his subordinates were away from the area at the moment. She was sleeping at the moment but he didn't know how long that would last. She was definitely innocent and didn't look like the evil man that had raped Roy in the past for four straight months. Even if he agreed to do anything to help keep the others safe, the man still forced him against his will and he had ended up making this kid here in front of him.

Reluctantly, he put a finger lightly on her nose, happy that she didn't wake up. He lightly traced his finger across her forehead seeing that she was still a little itty bitty baby. Mayleigh Isabella, he thought. The man was retired and couldn't force him into anything anymore but he was still scarred. He hated the fact that Ed was treading carefully around him. He just needed a bit more time than Ed could fuck him into the mattress for all he cared. The baby yawned and he paused in touching her hair which was much like his although different in color.

After a moment's hesitation, he pulled her out of the car seat and finally was able to hold her if only out of curiosity. He played with her little hand for a little bit before trying to find out which features belonged to him again. She started to move again and he adjusted her so that she couldn't fall. Her mouth opened again to yawn and finally she began to wake up but remained quiet. Her large brown eyes seemed to blink but filled with tears once she saw him and she wailed.

Seeing Hawkeye coming in the room, he shoved Mayleigh over to her rushing out after that. He couldn't believe that his own child didn't like him! Running down the hall and ignoring the shouts from behind him, he reached the bathroom and locked himself into the stall. Why did Ed try to get him to get close to her knowing that the baby didn't even like him? He felt like he should've deserved that after what he had done to her. He basically abandoned her, forcing Ed to take the responsibility and now she didn't want anything to do with him.

"Colonel are you in here?"

Roy tried to ignore Havoc's voice, turning away from it but it proved difficult. He knocked and Roy flinched a little before remembering that he wasn't in danger. He forgot often that he wasn't going to be used that way anymore. If anything he was unfair to Ed. He pushed Mayleigh onto him stating he wasn't ready and never paid her the time of day. Then he kept freezing up during sex and he could tell even though Ed seemed confused, he didn't ask which made him even guiltier than before. He found himself throwing up before he could get a grip on what he was doing but Havoc seemed to lose patience, finding a way to open it himself before coming in.

"Colonel, what was that? Hawkeye said that you handed off your baby to her and ran for it. I know that you have been trying to get used to the change but Mayleigh doesn't deserve to have you snub her. If you didn't love her, why didn't you just let her get adopted? I know Ed loves her so much already but he can't take care of her AND take care of restoring his brother. You need to meet him half way-"

He stopped when Roy threw his arms around him in the form of an awkward hug on Havoc's part at least before the man started to break down. He really didn't believe this was happening only believing the man to be a jackass and now wanted to really talk some sense into him. What's wrong with you, he thought fearfully. Did you have a solid reason for not wanting to see your baby for some time now? He returned the hug halfheartedly not understanding at all why he would just break down like that.

"Listen, calm down and we can talk. Mayleigh loves you okay? You may not have spent much time with her but she is still your baby girl right? Please promise to at least try to take care of her-"

"Mayleigh doesn't love me Havoc," Roy whimpered feeling a fresh wave of tears came on. "She cried when she saw me!"

Havoc sighed tightening his hold on him. It was new to him seeing his Commander breaking down and crying but he assumed it was because of the post-partum. He wouldn't tell him that though since he still liked his face. Pay back sure was a bitch though, he reasoned letting the man get everything out. He rubbed his back thinking about how Roy used to be such a heart breaker and now he was the one in the position thinking his own little girl hated him. Again he blamed the emotions being out of whack as well.

"Listen Roy, she doesn't know you. You are unfamiliar to her but just continue holding her, talk to her, feed her, and try to play with her. Babies will cry. It happens all the time but she is your baby. Let her so she doesn't get spoiled but don't ignore her. She will only remain small for a little while but then there will be a time that you wish that she was this size again."

Roy removed himself from Havoc to give him a questioning look.

"You mean she cried because she didn't know me and not that she hated me?" he asked hesitantly.

Havoc refrained from rolling his eyes knowing that this was Roy's first child and he was the only child growing up so he never had to deal with a baby before. He was different and had all those siblings. Even Ed had Al. Hawkeye may not have had a sibling but he was sure being a woman, she probably babysat for some friend in the past because even she knew more about babies than Mustang did. Everyone nearly forgot that the Flame alchemist was human too and susceptible to mistakes as well sometimes. He smiled realizing what the problem was now.

"It'll be okay sir. Do something to show your love for her. Play with her and show her that she is crying for nothing. She's bound to remember your voice. You carried her for so long-"

"Didn't want to though and she probably knows it too. Are you sure she doesn't resent me for that?"

Havoc wanted to snap and ask why he carried her if he hadn't wanted to but refrained. He knew that he would only lie some more. The baby was the one being affected by this though and Ed but ultimately the innocent little life. He had to get his boss to understand that she was just a baby and didn't even know the meaning behind hating somebody yet. She was at his mercy and she was close to those who hung with her. If he chose to not be close, then she wouldn't be and she would cry because she didn't know who the hell he was!

"Listen and listen well. The baby doesn't even know what hate is yet. She does recognize faces though and you wouldn't even hold her before today so of course she'll cry. Familiarize yourself with her Chief and she won't have any reason to come to hate you okay? Good, so go and get her something that would help."

Roy nodded feeling slightly better but couldn't know what a baby would want. He really was a bad parent in the end but as long as Havoc disagreed, he would give it a shot. Who was he to deny the man's faith in him?

* * *

><p>"Mayleigh? Lookie I got you something you'd like." He waited for her to see him and she began to cry again. He stiffened but didn't break eye contact with her, kneeling down and laying the blanket he made for her hoping she would like it.<p>

Placing a toy teddy bear in front of her, he waited to see how she would react to it. She acted like she was reaching out and he smiled going to pick her up. She cried as he laid her into his arm but he showed her the teddy bear again and she stopped although tears remained in her eyes. He wiped them away with the pad of his thumbs and gave her small kisses on her cheeks. She seemed confused.

He just smiled.

"You're gorgeous Mayleigh. I made them myself although they aren't as good as the one's you get from stores. See here the eyes on the bear are a little lopsided and I ran out of pink for the blanket so I made it checkered with different colors. Not like how another parent would do it but I like the result and I do love you Mayleigh. I didn't abandon you I was just afraid and I'm sorry. You're my baby though and I love you."

He placed the bear by her little hands hoping she wouldn't start crying again. Smiling, he saw that she was dressed up in a dress with a barrette in her pretty brown hair. He idly wondered what her half-sisters looked like. He knew they were identical twins but didn't know much after that. He wondered how she ended up with brown eyes and hair if he had raven black and the other had had dark hair as well. His eyes were blue though and he couldn't see how she would end up with the color she had.

Kneeling down to the floor, he placed her onto her stomach before going onto his to observe her more. He knew he should be doing his paperwork but he found suddenly that spending time with his daughter was a lot more fun than doing the tedious boring stuff. Ed and Al were still away and he knew the blonde couldn't stop worrying about him. He knew that he had everyone watching him but they didn't have to worry anymore. He had her just fine.

When she started crying though, he panicked and tried to rock her. It didn't work and he found himself slowly losing it. Havoc said she wouldn't cry for very long! Seeing Havoc come through the door this time around, he finally demanded that he help him with her. He only sighed and checked her diaper instead. Turning to Roy he seemed to think it was rather tedious before remembering Roy had no clue about babies. He never held Elysia as a baby either nor did he take care of her for Hughes. He was in East City for the majority of her infancy.

"She needs a diaper change." Roy seemed to calm down and he showed him how to do it the proper way. He also explained that he shouldn't panic and lose his cool every time she cried. She was a baby and couldn't speak yet so she was going to be this way. Roy nodded throughout the explanations especially when Havoc told him about the feedings.

"She can't just, I don't know, eat pancakes?"

Havoc slapped him upon the head.

"How the hell did you figure that out? I know you aren't stupid! Didn't you read any baby books before you gave birth to her?"

Roy shook his head.

"At first I considered adoption."

Havoc now felt bad bringing that up. Why would Roy read stuff about that at all when he thought at first that he possibly wasn't good enough to be a parent? He hadn't known the reason but he didn't buy them, 'my boyfriend died in a car accident weeks before I found out about the baby' type excuses when he was at the hospital for the anemia and he didn't believe it now. He was lying about her paternity and he doubted they would ever truly know who fathered this little girl. It didn't stop her from being so cute though and it was good that Roy was finally getting his head out the clouds to see he shouldn't abandon her.

"If you don't mind me asking why did you consider adoption and why would you change your mind if you had wanted to?"

Roy looked away for a moment to think about it. He didn't want the baby to look like him, he thought. He had already suffered enough through the pain and the bleeding. Hell he let two strangers he didn't even know rape him and that felt like he had been torn from the inside out it hurt too much. He also thought that he wouldn't love the baby or give it what the baby needed. When he first saw her though after the birth, he didn't want to anymore. He saw her and knew that Ed loved her as well. It just took some time adjusting to the change that Roy had to get used to his daughter. He honestly didn't mean to seem like he abandoned her. He really didn't.

"I considered adoption because I thought she'd look like him and I changed my mind because I loved her."

Havoc nodded in understanding. Roy turned to him before smiling and continuing.

"Are you sure we can't feed her fries?"

Havoc changed his mind. His boss was an idiot.

* * *

><p>Roy was happy that work was out although he was now nursing a headache. Havoc didn't need to bang his head when he asked why babies couldn't have milkshakes. Hawkeye was worse throwing a baby book to him and telling him to read it. It was just about as plain as he'd see it there. He was just happy that he hadn't had to breast feed her.<p>

Now he was out of work and walking on his way home. Ed was supposed to arrive later and he had said to call somebody if he needed help. He knew there was a fat chance of that happening though since Havoc got tired of his questions. He never handled a baby before. He didn't even know what Elysia had eaten as a baby. He idly wondered if the baby could stomach chicken broth if he cooled it down. Consulting the book all he saw was milk. Babies were really hard to get though.

He somehow convinced Hawkeye tha the could take care of the baby tonight seeing as how the lieutenant had done so the night before because she would cry every time he got near her then. It tore at his heart that he let this happen but he knew he deserved it. She wouldn't be like this, according to Havoc, if he had held her from the start and paid even the tiniest bit of attention to her. He knew she loved Ed and giggled whenever he played with her. He guessed he wanted that type of relationship with her now seeing as how she wouldn't end up being that monster.

Turning to his apartment, he quickly inserted the key into the lock and pushed the door open. Letting himself in he placed the car seat on the table, pulling Mayleigh out and laying her out on the floor making sure to put pillow and blankets below her to keep her comfy. He then consulted the book to see if it specified what kind of milk the baby needed. It just said warm milk. Was it whole milk or the 2 %?

"You babies are complicated, you know that May May?" he turned to the infant to see her start to whine. He knew she was hungry but they told him to figure this out on his own. Hell with it he thought throwing the book down.

Grabbing the milk, he placed it in a pan before heating it up enough that it was warm to the touch but not scalding hot. It was soy milk and the only type he had but he hoped she didn't mind. He picked her up and sat down onto the couch, putting the nipple by her mouth. She was hungrily suckling at it and he smiled realizing he got something done right. He waited until she was finished before taking away the bottle. Picking her up, he put the bottle in the sink when she threw up on him. Was that supposed to happen?

He quickly got the phone and was about to call Havoc, all the yelling be damned when the door opened. Ed looked really wet but that's not what had him angry. Quickly he told him how the baby didn't like the milk and how she vomited afterwards like she had hated it before Ed put a hand up silencing him.

"What?" Ed finally asked after a pause in which he hung up his coat on one of the racks to dry off and headed to the bedroom to change. He thought it weird that he hadn't seen Al but Ed had said something about the younger brother before he left for the mission. He hesitated before entering the room and Mayleigh got tired of not getting the attention before throwing up on her papa again.

Ed laughed out loud and Roy glared at him.

"Well why is she throwing up? I knew she didn't like me!" Ed quickly took the baby from him seeing as how Roy didn't look really good. He hoped that he didn't panic at all during his time away realizing it had only been two days this time.

"You did burp her between feedings right?" Roy gave him a look and Ed sighed before putting the baby over his shoulder and burping her as if to show Roy the reason why she hadn't tolerated the food. It really had nothing to do with him.

He was surprised that Roy was actually holding her now though. It was sure an improvement although Hawkeye he imagined had taken her home the first day so that Roy wouldn't panic so much. It really was a lot for the man to handle for only the second day of finally paying her some attention. Ed knew that he was scared but surmised that he could now help him. Roy had taken off his shirt that was now in a desperate need of being washed and Ed motioned for him to come to the bathroom.

"I say she needs a bath before bed, don't you?" She had finally burped and looked to be much more compliant afterwards. Roy took her from Ed so he could start the bath water but didn't fill it up all the way. Roy did not think that she should have one though.

When Ed had asked, his only reply was, "Isn't she a little bit small?"

Ed just glared at him although he knew that wasn't what Roy had meant. Of course she was small; she was a baby after all. He really was going to ask what his subordinates had to put up with, seeing as how Roy was acting like she would break. He took her from Roy again to wash her and although she cried not seeming to like that, Ed just handed Roy a camera and told him to start taking pictures of his daughter's first bath. Roy listened although after the first flash, she seemed to like the bath more.

"She is so like you. She'll hate anything unless she is getting attention." Roy didn't agree but decided to let it be.

Afterwards, she was changed and put into a sleeper before Ed placed her in the crib. Once she was sleeping, Ed turned to him and pulled him down for a passionate kiss. He let Ed's tongue in to explore the inside of his mouth whilst pulling him in the direction of the bathroom. He wondered why until Ed broke it off to start up the shower and he realized why.

"You ready for some tonight or are you going to freeze up again?" Ed knew it was rude to treat him this way but he didn't want to spend another night jerking himself off because Roy suddenly became unable to handle it or changed his mind before they even started.

Roy nodded and Ed removed his own clothes waiting for Roy to do the same. Seeing as how Roy took his slow sweet time, he helped him out and then grabbed a condom from the pocket of his pants. Once they were in the shower, he didn't hesitate to pull him into a chaste kiss. He trailed kisses and bites down his jaw line and down his neck seeing as how Roy wasn't freezing up for once.

Roy closed his eyes tightly once Ed's mouth left his and tried to tell himself that he wanted this. It wasn't the same as the general. The man had used his body out of lust and played with his mind so many times that Roy started to hate sex with a passion. While Ed was getting lower, he tried to calm down and remember that Ed would never use him like that. He wouldn't force him to go through unbearable amounts of pain. He wasn't Charles damn it! Charles only took him to the shower once though and didn't seem to like it. He knew it was after he had to have been starting to show. He remembered it like it was yesterday.

_"Come on baby, this is your shower. Hurry up and get your clothes off, I'm waiting. Or do you like a cold one better? It wouldn't do since I know that you are in fact the flame alchemist. HURRY UP!"_

_Flinching Roy quickly made it to the shower having hastily thrown his clothes off when he started to raise his voice. The man just slammed his head against the wall once he was inside before licking and nipping at his throat. He flinched but he didn't seem to care. He laughed making his way down the small curve at the stomach._

_"Baby you gained some weight. I think you should go on a diet of possibly not eating for a couple of days because you sure have gotten fat." Roy didn't let it show that it bothered him and Charles pushed him down to his knees before shoving his bursting cock into Roy's mouth. The shower was starting to get warm but he knew that Charles wouldn't stop even if it were freezing cold. The man didn't even wait for him to even start before grabbing onto each side of his head and slamming his member into a fast pace to the back of his throat. When the man cummed, he made sure that Roy swallowed every single drop before laughing._

_"Water will be cold before we're finished baby but you know that you are so good looking that you could get anybody here to fuck you in the shower right?"_

_"Yes Charles." He said when he saw that he was going to slap him for being silent. The man just grinned before sitting in the bathtub and putting his arms around his waist. Roy snapped his eyes shut knowing what was about to happen._

_Charles plunged his again bursting member into Roy's entrance, waiting until Roy was seated on him and he was all the way in. He often tried his sick fantasies on him but not this time; he probably wanted to just fuck him. Last time he had taken to the toys which had Roy limping half the day at work and hoping nobody would notice. Charles didn't waste any time and started to push Roy up with his hands on his hips before slamming him down again. He flinched knowing how Charles liked it fast and rough and dry. He tried not to show he really hated this so he wouldn't get the satisfaction that it hurt him. Charles just started to nibble on his neck as he continued to slam into him at a fast pace before finally cumming into him. Waiting a moment to catch his breath, he finally pulled Roy out before turning him to face him._

_"I mean it. I want you to lose the weight before I see you next time or I will fuck you fast, raw, and hard into your mattress got it?" Roy had nodded that time but he still got the punishment. _

_He had gained five pounds the next time he had seen him._

"Roy? Roy? Please talk to me! If you aren't enjoying this you should at let me know and we could stop." Roy still had his eyes squeezed shut remembering the pain and hurt that he went through throughout those months. Ed sighed before pulling Roy into a hug.

The man seemed to be calming down some but it didn't change the fact that his heart beat started picking up when he began to insert a finger. He knew he was going to freeze up on him though. A part of him did and he knew it wouldn't be going away quickly. He was at least happy that Roy was starting to see Mayleigh more and not snubbing her. At least that small miracle was granted. He didn't know why he acted this way but decided he wouldn't push him. Pushing him could turn to a mental breakdown which would be harder to fix.

He just hoped that whatever it was, Roy would talk to him and not continue to leave him in the dark. He needed to know Ed loved him no matter what.

* * *

><p>AN: Please review and tell me what you think!


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA.

Warning: Past onesided Maes/Roy, current Ed/Roy. Flashbacks to rape.

* * *

><p>NINE<p>

Roy rejected Mayleigh again.

Ed didn't know what it was that got him to do that but he would be fine for little moments at a time but at other times he would push her away. She was going to develop abandonment issues if he kept it up though and Ed was getting sick of his bullshit. The man had to choose to either love her or give her up to someone but he couldn't just play with her feelings like that. It was just cruel.

He wanted to shout at him and shake him until the stubborn man understood but he realized the reason he hadn't truly yet. The man was hurting in his own way. He often had nightmares and sometimes he would even sob although when he was awake he was often his normal smug self. It hurt though that he never told him what they were about since it was obviously causing him problems. He still froze up whenever Ed did more than kiss him and wouldn't even let him get in situations that could lead to love making.

Ed sighed trying to put that behind him seeing as how he was getting another assignment. He wasn't going to leave until tomorrow but he was already worried. He knew Roy couldn't stand Mayleigh for very long and that was why he decided to ask Gracia this time around. He didn't want to come home to see him panicked again although it got him bonding with his daughter and seemed to push him into wanting to be with her.

"Hey Roy, I think Gracia would say yes-"

"No Ed, I think I could take care of my own daughter. She'll be fine with me."

Ed didn't bother to argue and only thought how strange it was. He saw Al coming towards them and nodded to show he heard Roy even though he didn't agree in his decision. Al waved to Roy who only nodded. Ed didn't even want to bother talking to him anymore about the subject but knew that if there was a problem, that the others would call him about it. He would give the number to the hotel later so that he could keep in touch.

"Hey sir, Mayleigh is already getting big. I love how her eyes are a little lighter but her hair is the same color as when she was born. You think she will keep that eye color?"

Roy had hoped so. If she didn't, that meant she would have the man's dark blue eyes. He chose not to say anything and Ed turned to Al. Al nodded as though he understood and Ed took Mayleigh from Roy.

"I think we should let Gracia visit with her for the night so that we could talk."

Roy didn't seem to like that idea but Ed didn't give him room to discuss it. Ed didn't like that Roy was trying to avoid it or the fact that he would not say a little thing about what was bothering him but chose not to bring it up yet as they talked to Gracia about letting Mayleigh spend the night. Roy was exceptionally quiet and Ed knew it was not because he was missing Mayleigh.

He waited for Roy to come into bed before turning to him with no intention of actually sleeping. Roy didn't look scared at the moment but he knew that the man would freeze up before he even got to sex, he always did. He didn't do that before in the past but ever since Mayleigh was born it seemed that he hated it with a passion. He didn't know why but he knew Roy was trying to stop him for a reason. He was scared but he didn't know why.

"Do you not like me or something? I know you said before that you didn't hate me but you won't even allow me to make love to you anymore." His expression softened seeing as it must have hit home for Roy and he was feeling guilty. "Can you at least tell me why you don't like it?"

Roy shook his head and Ed was sick and tired of not getting an answer. Pinning his wrists above his head, he tried to get him to look at him. Roy moved his head to avoid looking at him and Ed had quite enough. His lust was over the breaking point for the man and he couldn't just keep being skittish over this. He brought his lips to the other's mouth and pushed his tongue in not seeing a difference in the man. There usually never was.

Without hesitation, he removed his clothes first and then Roy's seeing as how he seemed to get rather fidgety when his were removed right away. He pushed one lubricated finger in to prep him and seeing him exhale deeply, he ignored that for the time being. Not tonight he told himself. He added another finger instead seeing as how Roy didn't do anything to stop him. After the third one, he quickly placed a condom on himself and lubricated it before climbing on top of him before pushing his member in. Roy made him stop half way letting out a painful groan and he waited until he felt that he was ready before pushing the rest of the way until he was seated fully in him. Roy gasped and wrapped his legs around him to try to keep him there.

"Relax," Ed told him soothingly. "You know I won't hurt you Roy. Just calm down alright?"

He didn't wait for Roy's reply, giving him a small reassuring kiss on his lips before slowly pulling out only to thrust back in. He ignored Roy's startled gasp picking up the pace a little and watching how Roy gritted his teeth and closed his eyes tightly shut. He knew that there was no other way to get Roy to realize that he wasn't going to hurt him than to actually show him that he wouldn't. It took Roy himself to be curious about how his daughter was that got him even holding her in the beginning.

He quickened his pace seeing as how Roy seemed to want it now. Roy let out a moan when he hit the spot and Ed smiled, kissing him on the lips as he aimed to hit that spot again. All too soon Roy ended up cumming and Ed soon followed after a couple of more thrusts. He quickly gave him another kiss on the lips before trying to get eye contact with him.

"I won't hurt you Roy, I love you okay." Seeing as how he had to get that in his head that he wouldn't hurt him nor would he force him, he pulled out, disposing of the condom before giving him a hug around the middle. "I won't force you into something you don't want and I most certainly would not do anything you say no to okay? I love you."

Roy saw Ed falling asleep and found himself drifting off as well. Before he welcomed the blessing he mumbled to Ed, "I love you too," before he joined Ed in a silent slumber not to long afterwards.

* * *

><p>Mayleigh was getting older and before they knew it she was now just beginning to walk. The eleven month old was as cute as a button and people would often stop them to let them know how cute she was. Roy had to even yell at Havoc once for taking her to the park in order to score dates. He was relieved that her eyes stayed a golden brown color with flecks of green and not the bastard's dark blue. He was so sure that at almost a year old, the eye color wouldn't change. Also was the fact that she had brown hair and it wasn't as dark as his nor the bastard as well.<p>

Lying in bed with Ed one night, he turned seeing as how Ed was talking about a previous mission he had gone on with Al which in turn made him wish that Ed was back in his department. Ever since he had gotten together with the blonde, Ed had switched to another department so that it wouldn't be against the rules. That meant that he was under General Sherman who was a nice guy but ever since the other General, Roy had lost all faith in them. That man had seemed nice too and eleven months ago, he ended up having his baby. There was one thing Ed brought up that had him startled more than the rest though.

"I wonder, do you think you would want another baby? I mean we've been real careful about not getting you pregnant but would you even want another? I know it was really hard with Mayleigh because she was your first but now she seems to be doing okay. Would you even consider it?" Roy didn't think he would but wouldn't tell Ed that.

The Elric seemed happy about it and although he was often trying to still restore his brother, he found himself wishing that Al had the life he had wanted. Their funds were in better shape now since the General had given them their own separate from the rest, the only thing Roy had thanked the General for. He still had the nightmares but they were often few and far between. Ed wanting a child scared him a bit though. That would mean that there would be even more love making which he wasn't sure he was ready for seeing as how he more often than not shot Ed down when he wanted to. He couldn't even think of another baby though.

"Don't you think Mayleigh should be a little bit older? Like potty trained first," Roy quickly got in. Ed seemed to ponder that before sighing.

"I just wish I had a baby that was biologically mine. Don't get me wrong, I do love Mayleigh but another that was actually my blood would be good too. Plus Mayleigh would get a younger sibling." A younger sibling was something Roy didn't want. He didn't hate the kid but the idea of having another kid left small goose bumps and he was sure that he couldn't even think of it right now. He gulped down the thoughts for the moment though.

"Mayleigh thinks you are her daddy so she is yours as far as I'm concerned. You should know that blood has nothing to do with it. I just wish that you would wait some. Maybe when she turns two-"

"Then they would be three years apart basically," Ed reminded him. "My brother and I have a good bond because we're so close in age. Not that we wouldn't if we were further apart by age but we shared almost everything together."

Roy could see what he was pointing at. He just didn't want to carry another child again. He supposed it was selfish though seeing as how he couldn't really blame Ed for wanting another. Maybe this time it would be a boy and it would have Ed's golden eyes. All he knew was that Mayleigh looked nothing like her biological daddy and for that he was happy. Well happy when she wasn't getting dirty and making a mess in the kitchen.

"What would you want anyways?" He always wondered idly if Ed had wanted a boy more than anything else. He knew that was something that a lot of men had wished for so that the son could carry the last name with them but he wasn't worried about that trash. Ed though had a brother and the only thing that came close to a sister was his bond with Winry.

"A healthy baby. It shouldn't matter after that." Roy realized why he loved him all over again and gave him a peck on the lips. Ed smiled and even though he knew he really didn't want another, if Ed did he would go another nine months just for him.

Ed leant forward and nibbled on his bottom lip asking for entrance which he granted. He knew that Ed would stop if he told him too but he also knew that he didn't like it when he initiated these things and didn't finish it. He allowed Ed to get on top of him and the kiss deepened as Ed helped to remove his shirt. Ed removed his own, going back into the kiss and Roy wondered idly what Ed would do with another child if he was away on missions all the time. He did spend a lot of time with Mayleigh though and kept his word at saying he would never be like Hoenhiem. Ed placed his hand in the waistband of his pants and Roy let out a surprised gasp before he was able to stop it.

That didn't deter Ed from inserting a finger, already prepping him for the round of lovemaking he was sure they were going to have. He left his lips to nibble down his throat, swirling his tongue as he went. Roy moaned and he felt another finger joining the first. He almost shouted but kept himself from doing so at the last minute. He didn't enjoy this but for Ed he would. Charles ruined everything for him.

_Roy didn't think it would be bad after a week to agreeing to the proposal that Charles given him. He knew that his subordinates were safe as long as he did what he asked. The man had finally come over after a two days' business trip and Roy had felt relief during that time but it was short lived. The man twisted his arms behind his back until Roy winced and asked him to please stop. The man didn't seem too enthused with him and just slapped him in the face._

_"I heard that women have been asking you out since I've been away! What a horrible thing and I hope you better have told them no. From now on you're mine." He had paused to pull down his pants, pinning the hands that were already behind Roy's back into an awkward position so he wouldn't think about moving them. "That means no girlfriends and definitely no one else to make you feel good. You have me and only me."_

_Roy let out a scream when the man entered him but Charles didn't seem to care for he started to slam into him without thinking about the pain that Roy was going through having been taken dry. At each thrust, Roy tried to blink back tears of pain but it was no use and once Charles saw that, he just chuckled in amusement._

_"I don't know why it hurts you. If you just stayed quiet and let yourself enjoy this, I doubt you would be crying. Is it that you regret the agreement? I know that you want to keep your subordinates safe so you better shut up if you want it to continue! Stop your damn crying because nobody is going to feel sorry for you!"_

_All too sudden, he brought his lips in a bruising kiss, ceasing the pained gasps every time he thrust back into him. He drew back as though to prove that he was going to make it as painful as possible if he wanted to cry about it by quickening the pace. Roy bit his lip to keep from crying out and Charles just laughed at that._

_"You're learning quickly. I see you really care about someone out there baby. Just be a good boy and let yourself feel good. Maybe someday you could take what I'm showing you and use it on somebody. This is taking too damn long though and I can't let go of your arm because you accidentally hit me yesterday."_

_Roy remembered and he hadn't meant it. The man had come behind him during work and he didn't expect him to be in the office. By the time he realized it was him, he knew he was going to be in trouble. Charles withdrew from him only to make him lay flat on his stomach, using handcuffs to secure his wrists on the bed rails. Afterwards, he grabbed a hold of his hips and pushed back in without a warning. He held back a scream but it came out as a painful yelp which got him a smack in the face._

_"I didn't say you could make any noises. Did I say you could? You will shut up until I want you to scream my name!" He stopped yelling at him using his hips to ram into him. Compared to what he was doing earlier, this was far worse._

_He was getting in farther with longer strokes and was going at a faster rhythm than before. Squeezing his eyes shut tightly, he hoped that he would quickly end this knowing how much he was going to end up bleeding the longer he rode this out. After what seemed like forever, the man cummed inside him and pulled out. Roy was upset to find his own cum on the sheets. He didn't enjoy it at all but it seemed that his body in some sense had. _

_Gritting his teeth, he waited for Charles to let him go so the man could go home. It had to have been late and even though he didn't have work tomorrow, he knew the General was trying to appease Kate so she wouldn't take his girls and leave town. He held back a sigh of relief when he had removed the handcuffs but Charles had only seated him on his lap facing him away from the man. He wondered what he was planning before the man drove his bursting member back into his sore backside. He used his hips to slide him back and forth on his cock, licking and biting at his throat while ignoring the small hisses. He came again before allowing Roy to lie down. He smiled as though he alone knew what Roy wanted and although he despised the man, he fought to catch his breath after going through that much of tremendous pain._

_"I don't want to hear about another one flirting with you, you hear me?" He held his chin with both hands forcing Roy to look into his eyes._

_"I promise Charles." The man kissed him on the lips, only pushing him away when he was finished and went to get dressed. Roy lay there waiting until he heard the door shut before allowing his body to relax. He would never like this but it seemed Charles enjoyed it. _

_It wasn't until he got sick around two weeks later that he thought he caught something. He never would have believed that it was that night alone that he would have conceived a baby but then again, he tried to forget all of what happened to him. He didn't know what he would do if he realized when Mayleigh had exactly been made._

Ed had long ago stopped seeing that Roy was crying. He didn't cease yet and Ed held him waiting for him trying the comfort him the best he could. Roy kept on mumbling the words stop and even though Ed hadn't gone any further and Roy still had the bottom half of his clothes on, he seemed to be thinking that Ed would be a bastard and continue even though he knew that Roy had told him no. He kissed the top of his head and ran a hand soothingly through the other man's hair wishing he would calm down.

"Roy I'm not going to okay. I stopped. I stopped okay."

Roy was obviously not listening and Ed believed it was all in his mind. He wondered how that could be seeing as how he never mentioned anything like that before. Havoc had told him how Roy was himself in the office and was even doing well with Mayleigh. He mentioned Roy's nickname for the girl and how the child seemed to like it. Ed had caught Mayleigh even repeating it saying 'May May wuv ou,' from time to time. He waited until Roy's shoulders stopped shaking and saw that he was in a fitful sleep by now. He didn't have the heart to wake him knowing he hardly got any sleep now as it was. I'm sorry Roy, he thought. If I was any good I would know that something was bothering you and wouldn't try to talk you into this. I'm such a bad boyfriend.

He just hoped Roy didn't get worse because he doubted it could get any better after hearing this.

* * *

><p>Mayleigh was talking more and Roy seemed to be in a better mood. Ed was walking on eggshells around him though knowing that for some reason that he didn't notice before, Roy was suffering from an unknown pain. It made sex difficult for the man and Ed wondered if he even wanted Mayleigh the way he was going on. He now doubted that he even had a fling that made her and instead probably had some type of trauma or something. He gulped thinking that maybe she was the product of rape and that was probably the reason he had shunned her at first. It made sense and Havoc was equally mad thinking about that. If he was raped why didn't he seek help? Didn't he know that they wouldn't think any different about him if he had told them? They couldn't think of a reason but Ed knew that Havoc hadn't bought the car accident story and knew that they would never know her paternity if this kept up.<p>

It seemed that Mayleigh was helping Roy with whatever it was though since he had initiated the next kiss and even seemed to have a new interest in sex. He talked about one of their previous conversations and about maybe having another baby. He stated how he missed when Mayleigh had been in his tummy and how it felt to feel her kicking in the early stages of pregnancy. He didn't say it that way and tried to hold onto the fact that he was still a man saying that he didn't have postpartum no matter how many times they said he would and Ed just held back saying he was in a worse mood than he had been when he was carrying the girl. He had indeed had postpartum but he refrained from saying that since the man was talking babies for some reason.

Then came a period where every night, the man tried to have sex with him only stopping before the actual thing and Ed let him. No need to force him into something and it eased the nightmares knowing that Ed let Roy decide when he wanted it. It turned out though that it was too soon to be thinking about babies since Ed was away a lot on missions and he didn't want the baby to suffer. Roy seemed to understand that though. Of course the one night they finally did have sex, it was when the condom broke.

Roy started by deciding to ride him that night. Ed was tired from returning from a mission but the man seemed to think that it was okay since he was going to be doing the work. Ed should have put the condom on but he hadn't bothered letting the man do everything. He assumed that even though Roy didn't enjoy it often, he possibly gotten horny as well. He really got him into it though riding him like that and before he knew what he was doing, he had the man on his back and he was slamming into him while Roy moaned in pleasure. When Ed cummed and pulled out, he realized with a start that the condom was missing.

"Ed I think I know where it is." Ed was afraid to know seeing as how this wasn't something they had had planned. Roy was holding it up and it was evident that it broke. "It makes no difference anymore I guess."

Roy shook his head.

"It probably took weeks for Mayleigh to be made. I doubt it would be this one time that would cause this to happen, you'll see."

And see he would.

* * *

><p>Roy took Mayleigh to the park whilst trying to settle the bit of nausea he was feeling. She smiled up at him seeing as how her papa was taking her to the park. She was allowed out of the stroller once they got there and Roy settled onto the bench hoping that he wouldn't vomit. Ed was on another mission this week and wouldn't be back for a month.<p>

"Papa, papa," the girl called out.

She came back with sand in her hands and beamed when Roy placed her sand into a cup for her. She took the cup and went back to the sand box. She was sixteen months now but it seemed that she was doing a lot now that she hadn't before. She was talking more and even went as far as to whistle. He was surprise by how smart she was for her age. But she didn't seem to mind. She was goofy most of the time and pouted whenever he didn't laugh.

"She is a cutie."

Roy nodded seeing as how the women often complemented her looks. The woman watched the girl for a moment longer before turning back to him with a smile. He didn't know where he knew her from but he seemed to have a sense of déjà vu but quickly dismissed it. He couldn't have known this lady.

"I have twin girls myself but they have blonde hair and their daddy's dark blue eyes."

His eyes widened but she didn't seem to see that in favor of talking more about her girls. Clara was older by one minute and she was a beauty although both were identical. She was the good girl and she was seven years old. Maria was the devil always causing other kids to cry. They never did look like any one of the other siblings that her husband had and instead took after both their father and mother.

"I was disappointed you know since I would have liked for them to have his deceased brother's look even a little bit. He was like my husband's best friend and he understood him the best before he died. You know it's weird but seeing your girl, I'd say they have familiar features. She has his hair color and definitely his eyes. I'd say that she was his brother's daughter if I were to show you a picture of him."

Roy quickly shook his head and laughed although he didn't feel like doing that at the moment. He was scared and hoped that the man wasn't here. It was a bad idea to take Mayleigh to the park today seeing as how the General may be here. He thought that since the man was away, he would no longer have reason to fear him but he turned out to be dead wrong. At least his relationship with Ed was getting better.

"What's your daughter's name?"

"Mayleigh Isabella," he replied trying to swallow the wave of nausea washing over him.

"That's cute. It's unique as well. I wish me and Charles had thought about that when we named the girls." Roy nodded but he knew without a doubt that this was the former General's wife. She had to be. How many other Charles did he know that had twin girls?

"Mommy, we have the ice cream." Roy looked up in time to see the man that had been in his nightmares for such some time now. He quickly adverted his gaze hoping the man would leave him be and not say anything. He wanted to leave as fast as he could but of course his wife spoke up.

"Honey, his kid looks just like your late brother, isn't that weird. I know it's weird because he died before he had a child and she would have been eight had he had one at all! Look." Roy gulped seeing him look over and seemed to have frozen in place.

At that moment she had ran up to Roy, with the cup of sand now at the rim and beamed showing him it. She was talking a mile a minute although she didn't have a very big vocabulary yet. It didn't seem to stop her from trying and he could tell from the corner of his eyes that Charles was frowning. He hoped that the man would leave Mayleigh alone. He didn't want Mayleigh to be near him now that he knew that she was the optimum of sweet and wouldn't hurt a hair on anyone's head if he could help it.

"She's cute," the man commented making Roy look away and flinch. He smirked and Roy knew that he had meant to make Roy do that he surmised. The man hadn't been in his life for over sixteen months and he was still controlling him! "He's my former coworker by the way honey. Let me talk to him and could you please watch his daughter for him. It would be fast."

Roy held with abated breath as Charles led him towards the bathrooms. He knew fighting was futile so he let him lead him in and he shut the door behind him, only locking it seeing that there was nobody else in there. Once Roy turned to him, Charles slapped him hard across the face.

"How the hell did she get my brother's looks?" He expected Roy to know. He at first thought it was a blessing that she didn't have the man's looks but realized it was worse that she looked like his deceased brother after all. He hadn't known him though and it seemed the other man was real nice. He couldn't be too sure though because Charles seemed that way too and look what he did.

"I don't know Charles. I didn't ask for her to look like that, she just does." He quickly shut his eyes feeling another slap coming but he was surprised when it hadn't. He looked and saw that Charles looked angry but didn't seem bad other than that.

"You look better since the last time I saw you, ya know?" Roy flinched when the man cupped his chin, using the pads of his thumb to rub his chin in small circles. "I never forgot how good of a lay you were. In fact you were the best that I had. I'm almost glad that she is mine but of course my wife wouldn't know because I never told her. Your boyfriend probably doesn't either right?"

He laughed when Roy shook his head and kissed him on the forehead.

"Remember rule four? I can change any rule that I want and you have to obey it. Well I say that we should start meeting up again. I do miss you and I could always just mention my third daughter that is as cute as a button-"he cut himself off by sticking his tongue in Roy's mouth feeling the man shudder.

He pressed himself against him, deepening the kiss and tangling his hands in his hair. Hair that he reasoned the little girl should have gotten instead of his brother's chocolate brown. She also had his hazel eyes which made her uncannily similar to his late brother. Noticing that he wasn't kissing back, he just smirked against his lip knowing that a listless Roy was better than the one that struggled like he first had and boy was he spunky.

"Maybe we should start this up again right?" He knew Roy was probably going to fight him if he thought he could so he relieved the man of his gloves, throwing it to the other side. Roy didn't say a thing but he didn't expect him to. It had to have been a real shocker to see him after such a long time.

"To tell the truth Mustang, I can't stand fat people. Looking at you when you got so chubby just made me sick but now you don't have a trace left at all. I was worried you'd look different but I was blatantly wrong." He paused to pull him into another kiss, before pulling away. "We would have to meet under different circumstances I think. I am not going to let my wife think I've been cheating on her while she watched our younger daughter."

He winked and threw his gloves back to him. Seeing how Roy didn't move from his spot, he gave him a mock salute leaving him to collect himself before he fell apart in front of his daughter.

* * *

><p>AN: Please review and tell me what you think!


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA.

Warning: Past onesided Maes/Roy, current Ed/Roy. Flashbacks to rape.

* * *

><p>TEN<p>

Roy left not too long after that seeing as how Mayleigh was getting cranky and needed a nap. Before he was able to leave though, Charles told his wife to watch Mayleigh again for a minute and then took him away from the others but not as far as the bathroom like he had last time. Roy was about to ask what he was doing when he was pushed against one of the trees and Charles pulled him into a vicious kiss. Roy stiffened and Charles smacked him until Roy let himself loosen up feeling light headed but trying not to think about what the man was doing.

"You will have to accept my wife's invitation. Take your boyfriend with you okay? Oh and I want to see Mayleigh more. I can't very much allow my wife the heartache by taking away something good right? She always did love my brother more than me, hell she miscarried his kid!"

By the way he was yelling Roy was sure he had a lot of issues with his wife. Charles pressed himself further against him, his hand trailing down his jaw line. After removing it, he let out a tiny laugh.

"It figures the one baby I didn't mean to help bring into this world looks like Richard. Do me a favor and keep that little girl safe alright? I expect to see her at my house on Tuesday and if they ask just say that I wanted a play date with my twin girls. Okay?" Roy nodded and Charles smirked leaning in to kiss him on the forehead. He patted his head like a dog before turning around.

"Oh and don't be late. You military people still believe fifteen minutes early so be there or else you will learn all over again why you aren't supposed to make me mad!"

Roy quickly nodded.

Knowing that even though he didn't want to, he knew have would have to endure it so he didn't have much choice in the matter. Charles seemed happy enough and he wouldn't allow Mayleigh to get hurt. The little girl soon jumped into his arms and turned to give a wave to Charles and Kate. Roy didn't like how Kate seemed to just glow after seeing that and wanted to gag. How the hell did that woman even end up with that man if Charles had stated that she had loved his brother from the beginning? Did he force her into the relationship? Sighing, he gave her a peck on the cheek to which she turned and pecked him on the lips.

"I wuv ou papa. May May do."

Roy allowed himself to smile finally seeing that at least with Mayleigh, the love was genuine unlike the former general who only held lust for him. He still seemed to do so. He flinched again and quickly put her into her stroller before deciding it would be best to go home. He now had to prepare to take himself to the man's house and bring Mayleigh as well. He hated that but the worst part was that Ed would be out of town then. A part of him told him not to go but he knew what Charles was capable of even though he wasn't in the military anymore. He knew he had a lot of contacts and most were higher ups in the military. Hell he was friends with the Fuhrer!

He settled Mayleigh down for her nap and then made his way to the bathroom and threw up. The nausea was worse in the morning but he usually vomited in the evening. He hated how that logic worked but after realizing he wouldn't be vomiting anymore, he made his way to the kitchen to get something to eat. Eyeing the wasabi and left over spaghetti, he groaned finally heating up the food and mixing it with the wasabi before digging in. He hated wasabi although Ed loved it and even kept it around for his snacks. He wouldn't miss it but Roy found himself seriously sick that he was craving that of all things. Groaning, he finished it and took out the carton of orange juice, gulping it down from the container himself. He couldn't understand it though. He only had a big appetite if he accidentally skipped a meal or like when he had been pregnant with Mayleigh. He hoped he wasn't because Ed would have a conniption.

Finishing it off, he realized he shouldn't have done it, throwing up in the sink knowing there was no way in hell he would make it to the bathroom this time around. Well that was just perfect, he thought. If he was then Ed wouldn't be touching him anymore.

* * *

><p>Roy had bid goodbye to Ed at the train station with Mayleigh before making his way to the general's mansion. He better be happy that he was going to be earlier than expected because he wanted to leave earlier as well. It was already six thirty anyhow. When he knocked, the butler let him in and he let Mayleigh out of her stroller to play with both Clara and Maria who seemed to like the fact that they could have another kid in the house. He noticed that Kate wasn't home at all but Charles was in the living room reading when he was led there. Charles put the book down and pat a place beside him on the couch.<p>

He hesitantly made his way over against his better judgment and Charles put his arms around him making Roy bite his lip to keep from emitting a surprised gasp. Charles laughed and released him only long enough to pull him forward into his lap. Roy tried to get away but Charles held onto him tightly with a stern grin.

"You know how I told you that my wife was with my brother at first?" He nodded despite his increase of struggles which only made Charles smile more. "Well, I was okay with that you know and so was he. We shared her for a bit seeing as how me and my brother shared everything you know. I told Kate about everything but the kid. I didn't want her to get overly happy since it is obvious that I am not accepting another kid into my home. She will continue to live with you and will visit when I call you. However she is fine with me having my stress reliever."

Roy tried to get away but Charles pinned his wrist behind his back and held him closer, pulling him into his lap again. He paused to turn to the butler and ordered him to keep the kids occupied. He wanted them away from this room.

"Take them to the girls' room and keep them in there. Don't let Mayleigh find any choke hazards because beyond the fact that she is a smart girl, she is still only two. Right?"

Roy shook his head trying to get out of the man's lap but the butler didn't seem too surprised for he just bowed and left the room. Once the man had exited, Charles put his arm around Roy's middle and held him in place in his lap, his legs replacing his arm so that it was free to keep a hold on Roy's arms. He grabbed some rope on the arm rest and quickly tied his wrist behind his back, making sure he had limited movement before smacking him hard across the face.

"We can go on forever Mustang but it seems that the months you were not here has made you forget whose in control. I may let the butler have you after I'm done since he thinks you're cute. Know what that means Mustang? It means he wants you the way I've had you. My wife would probably want you to knock her up seeing as how your baby turned out browned haired and hazel eyed. Want to continue struggling? I'm sure I can find a lot more worse things to do to you."

Roy ceased in the struggles and Charles smiled. He placed him in his lap and rested his head on his shoulder, massaging a hand on his inner thigh, making Roy let out a choked gasp which only seemed to amuse the man. His other hand began to massage his other thigh in a circular motion which oddly enough made Roy start to struggle against the rope binding his wrists together.

"Do I need to punish you so soon again?" Roy stopped and Charles nodded before tipping his chin so that he was facing him. "Where's your blonde boyfriend?"

He didn't answer at first and Charles gave him a look to which he finally mumbled, "He's on a mission to the east."

Charles smirked resuming the massaging of his inner thighs knowing it was driving Roy crazy. He knew that his wife hated it when he was affectionate with her but Roy seemed to hate anything that implied sex of any kind. He knew it was because of what had been done to him but Charles didn't pity him nor did he think he was too hard on the man. He gave him the option from the beginning and Roy had made the sacrifice all on his own.

"How old is Mayleigh then if she's not two years old?"

He brought his mouth to Roy's neck, sucking the skin and he could feel Roy's pulse point underneath. He smirked before stopping enough to glare at the man.

"Seventeen months," he finally said and Charles went back to licking and biting his neck and jawline. He frowned realizing that the man had gained weight again but shrugged. He didn't care that the man was going to be having another baby it looked like. He couldn't be certain though and quickly pushed him back deeper into his lap.

Roy flinched feeling the man's hardened member on his backside although it was still clothed. Charles just pulled him back until he was far back that he could go. He put his lips to Roy's ear and licked it, only stopping to say a few choice words.

"I will let you out of the ropes if you ride me without hesitation and don't try to run as soon as I release you."

Roy shuddered knowing there was no way he would be doing that. He heard the door opening and glanced over to Charles to see if he would react. To his surprise the man looked a lot like Charles only taller but with gray eyes. Charles himself had frowned but decided that it didn't matter.

"What the hell? Does Kate know that you have that guy bound and on your lap while she's not home?"

Charles nodded and while the other looked annoyed, he didn't do anything much to Roy's dismay. Charles explained to him the deal that went on with him and Roy tried to hide his face although he was back to trying to remove himself from the man. The other one sighed before telling him a few choice words before leaving. Roy blinked finding himself off the man's lap thankfully although he still had his wrists bound.

"That is my brother you know. Devon doesn't like what I'm doing. All my brothers loved Kate as well. Richard had, I do, Devon still does, and Alex used to. Out of all my brothers though, Alex looks a lot like Richard only he doesn't have Richard's smile. Alex is the youngest and away at the moment. He doesn't like coming back though. He found a girl and got her pregnant though and she left him dry taking her baby along with. It was a girl you know? I guess he hates the fact that the rest of the family doesn't take relationships seriously."

Roy was glad that he was now on the other end seeing as how the man was busily explaining his brothers' backgrounds. He took the chance trying to get away from the man only to be tripped as he tried to escape the living room. Charles landed on top of him making him suck in air and unable to shout. Making sure he still couldn't try, Charles grabbed a rag and not caring if it were dirty or not, he stuffed it into Roy's mouth. He gagged trying to dislodge it from his throat because it not only kept him from sounding his protests but it was irritating his throat.

"I thought you had learnt your lesson. Come on and I'll show you my bedroom." He struggled despite Charles having him in a good hold. He almost dropped him on the stairs and cursed as his hold tightened on the struggling man before dumping him on his huge mattress. He pinned him down having locked the door so that he couldn't get out. He had the key and it would be impossible even if he wanted to.

He grinded down on him, making Roy yelp into the rag, muffling his reaction. Charles didn't seem to mind, since he continuously grinded his clothed length onto his thigh as though to get the message across that he could fight as long and hard as he wanted but the end results wasn't going to change. He didn't mind him fighting as he pulled down his zipper and freed the aching member from his pants, trying to slide it into the man's mouth. He clamped it shut and when he forced it open, he removed the rag. He tried to slide his member in when Roy bit down bringing a strangled moan of pain from the other man.

Roy felt blackness at the edge of his vision before Charles pushed his member into the alchemist's mouth and began to pound into it mercilessly without care to the choking sounds being uttered. Roy closed his eyes tightly and tried to wrap his mind around what was happening to him but Charles didn't seem to care. He released his seed and pulled out only to slap Roy in the face again.

"YOU SEEM TO FORGET WHOSE THE BOSS!"

Roy moaned and Charles didn't even waste taking off all his clothes and instead just slid Roy's pants and boxers down enough to slide his bursting cock into the entrance. Roy would've screamed if Charles hadn't placed the rag back into his mouth. He slammed into him, not caring that he was hurting him and definitely not worried about what taking him dry and hard would do to him. Roy began to let out choked cries of pain which he ignored feeling the tension leave his face at having this feeling back. Roy didn't seem to like it much though and he didn't care.

"Come on baby, I know that you can moan for me." He pushed himself back in waiting for the moan but what he got was another strangled cry. He sighed increasing his pace, placing his arms around his waist to thrust harder as well. Who was he to care if Roy didn't want to make it enjoyable? Let him suffer than.

Roy thought it was over when the man had cummed inside of him but Charles was far from over. Instead, he waited for a moment. He was still seated deeply inside him and after a moment's rest; he dug his nails into Roy's back before starting up another round. Any attempt to try to dislodge it failed especially when Charles made him lay forward onto his stomach. He used his hips as leverage and pushed into him again.

"You better like this because as soon as you start enjoying this even a little bit, I'll stop. As long as you are back at work tomorrow and you aren't going around telling everybody then we'll be fine. Do I have to make threats to get you to do something? Come on or I could just teach sweet Mayleigh to give head. I bet she'd be more compliant."

Roy mumbled something and Charles strained his ears. He took the rag out of his mouth before trying to decipher what he had been saying.

"Say it again what you just said."

"More please."

Charles nodded pleased that even though the enthusiasm was faked, he was trying to please him once his cute little daughter was mentioned. He removed himself from him to pull Roy's pants and boxers down to his ankles and flipped him onto his back before plunging into him again.

"I'll let the bindings of your wrist away if you put your arms around my neck baby." He nodded and he untied it.

Roy did as he promised and every time he pushed back into him, Roy let out gasps which he was sure would have turned him more on if he wasn't in such a hurry to end it so soon. He grabbed his hips again shoving into him a couple more times before coming once again. Sighing, he laid down on him to regain his energy. Fighting with the man was draining. He gave him a peck on the lips before removing his member, now slick with blood. He frowned remembering that Roy couldn't take it hard and dry. He didn't test taking him hard slicked with lube but wondered if he would tolerate more if he had. It didn't matter to him though because it wouldn't have ended this way if he hadn't tried to pull a fast one on him.

"I love this. I may not love you at all but you are a good lay. Next time you come, bring your boyfriend and then we could talk pleasantly. I'm sure you know not to tell him anything because of what would happen if you do. I know Kate accepts this but I also know for a fact that your full metal pip squeak would hate this. So do me a favor and shut your damned mouth."

By the time Mayleigh was out of the room, the girl asked him why he was walking funny. Roy covered it up by telling her they should get home before she missed her bed time. She waved to the other girls and waved to Charles saying a happy, "fank ou." About letting her stay with her friends. It was when he mentioned the possibility of her sleeping over that Roy quickened in putting her into the stroller trying to ignore that statement. After threatening using her if Roy didn't do what he had wanted, he would not let Mayleigh in his house alone.

He put her to bed quickly before vomiting again. His backside hurt but he knew it would so he didn't complain. He left the bathroom in time to catch the phone, hoping that it wasn't Charles telling him to let her. To his relief it was Ed.

"Hey Roy. I just wanted to say good night to Mayleigh. How are you doing? I wanted to check up on your wellbeing as well." Roy knew that was the main reason of his call. He usually only called on the weekends. He knew that Mayleigh would be asleep by this time anyways.

"I'm fine Ed. I love you."

If there was anything Ed expected, it wasn't that. A smile tugged at his lips even though he knew that Roy wasn't going to like what he was going to tell him.

"Roy, I have something to tell you." Roy thought it was going to be bad but he wasn't prepared to hear what it actually was until he said it. "Okay I met my dad today and even though we killed two of the homunculus, I found out he's behind this. I never thought he could be like that, you know. I got Lust and Sloth taken care of though. Gluttony attacked Dante and their still in the underground city. Greed had been dead though. Envy is still alive and so is Pride. Wrath is okay with my master. Roy don't you know, Pride is the Fuhrer!"

Roy almost dropped the phone but he was happy that it wasn't what he thought it was going to be. Not that it hadn't been bad news but he thought he would break up with him. He knew how bad Ed tried to get him to get into making love with him but he wasn't sure he would be ready for him for a while. He loved Ed though and it seemed that made the blonde's day to hear that.

"I'm sorry Ed."

Ed seemed confused for his next question was if he was okay. Okay? He wasn't because of Charles. He had wanted months ago to forget that it ever happened. He was coping although not so well but he was getting used to being intimate with Ed and knew that the other wouldn't hurt him. But the man came into his life again and now he didn't even feel like he deserved Ed anymore. He was dirty and he knew in some level that Ed shouldn't be with him anymore. Not that he didn't love him but Ed wouldn't have fallen to the man so easily.

"Roy I don't know what you are sorry for. If it's about before when you kept freezing up, I don't mind. Just take your time and we could even talk about it. It may help-"

"I'm sorry Ed! I really really love you and please believe me!"

"I do love you Roy and I do believe you do too. Don't apologize alright. I think you should call Havoc or Hawkeye and have them stay with you. I don't want you having another nightmare and I want you to be happy. I'll be back as soon as I could."

He bid his goodnight before hanging up the phone, exhaling deeply. He noticed finally that there was still blood dribbling down his leg and that he would have to take a shower. Once he stepped into the shower, he noticed that it was starting to dry but there wasn't any active bleeding anymore so that was good. He let himself cry only when he felt the water spraying onto him though. The water covered his tears and the noise covered his own cries. He wished that Ed wouldn't be mad if he ever did come to tell him. He felt like he cheated on him though. I'm really sorry Ed, he thought again as new wave of tears began to fall. His back side hurt terribly and he was sure that he wouldn't be able to sit right for a few weeks now.

"I'm sorry Ed," he told himself. "I'm sorry and I love you."

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><p>AN: Please review and tell me what you think!


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